Finding You: The Complete Box Set (a contemporary MM romance series)

by Ana Ashley

  It was slow, soft, and damned promising, like he was both apologizing for the misunderstandings and putting them all behind us with one kiss.

  I could have melted into him. Merged like those thin blocks of Lego that won’t separate once they’ve stuck together.

  Max’s had my hair wrapped in his hands, and his body was pressing me into the railing as though he wanted to make sure I couldn’t escape.

  Why would I want to when I hadn’t felt more at home, safe, cared for, and understood than when I was in Max’s arms?

  Max put some space between us much sooner than I’d wanted, making me wonder if he hadn’t enjoyed the kiss as much as I did.

  “Fuck, Isaac, take him off me,” he cried.

  Max turned around, and I saw Max using his claws to cling onto Max’s back. I laughed as I released the cat.

  “Come here, you. Were you saving me from the big, sexy man?” I held the cat in my arms and gave him a soft squeeze and rubbed his neck. “You will have to make friends with Max because he’s our guest this week. Okay?” I heard a soft purr, which I took as an acceptance from my feline savior.

  Max’s breath in my ear was warm as he wrapped his arms around me from the back and stroked the cat.

  “I guess I’m staying for the week,” Max confirmed to the cat as I melted into his chest, his breath on my neck.

  “Shall we go inside? It’s getting chilly out here.”

  My shiver had nothing to do with the cool evening air and everything to do with having Max pressing against me. In fact, I wasn’t shivery at all. I was very much warm all over.

  I closed the balcony door and locked it behind us, but I left the curtains open since no one overlooked us. My apartment faced the river, and sometimes during the night when I got up for a drink, I liked seeing the night sky when everything was dark and quiet.

  “Let’s give you a snack and then you have to go to bed. You’re too young to be up late,” I said to the cat.

  When I came back from the kitchen, Max was once again facing the balcony doors. He turned when he heard me.

  “Isaac.”

  “Yeah?”

  He ran his hands through his hair as though he’d forgotten it wasn’t there any longer. “I want to take you to bed so bad it’s like I’m not even in control of my body anymore. But I don’t think it’s a good idea.”

  I felt a pang of rejection, but deep down, I knew Max was right. As much as we had resolved our communication problems, there was still one massive issue over our heads. Max lived in Manhattan and I lived in Lisbon.

  “I know. You’re right. It would make things really messy.”

  “Friends?”

  “I’d really like that,” I said and walked to him for a hug.

  Max gave me a quick kiss on the lips and asked if we could watch some TV for the rest of the evening.

  We ended up watching a Portuguese telenovela.

  It had been a long time since I’d had such a relaxing evening. Even though Max and I had agreed to remain just friends, somehow having him near me was enough. I’d have taken friendship with Max any day over not having him in my life at all.

  I woke to the sound of Max swearing. I always left my bedroom door open in case the cat wanted to snuggle up, so when I sat up I had an uninterrupted view of Max’s room where he was lying on his front with the cat jumping on his back.

  “Max,” I shouted, and both looked my way. I couldn’t help laughing.

  I got up to give the cat his morning meal, hoping he’d follow me to the kitchen. He did his usual dance around my legs.

  “I know what you see in him, but we don’t scratch other people’s backs, okay?” Max meowed and then focused on his food.

  “Oh really? That’s not how it felt the last time we were together,” Max said as he leaned on the wall that partitioned the kitchen and the living room.

  My cheeks heated and my dick hardened in my boxer shorts. Fuck. I’d left the bedroom in just my underwear, and now I was facing a very dressed Max.

  His voice had been playful as he teased me, but his eyes were now pools of heat scorching my skin as they roamed my body from my head to my toes.

  His hardness was visible even under his jeans, and I was glad I wasn’t the only one affected by the other’s presence. Although, I did need to put some clothes on. Friends didn’t walk around each other in their underwear, right?

  “Er, I’m going to get dressed. There’s ground coffee in the freezer, and the coffee machine is just there,” I said, pointing to the counter. “If you get that started, I’ll make us some toast when I’m back.”

  I didn’t hear his reply as I escaped to my bedroom.

  After yesterday’s kiss, having Max in my spare bedroom, and now seeing how hard he got for me, I was too turned on to just get dressed.

  I went into my bathroom and got the shower started. It didn’t take me long until I was shooting my release all over the shower wall.

  The coffee pot was nearly full, but Max wasn’t in the kitchen when I returned.

  I’d put bread in the toaster and got sliced ham out of the fridge before Max appeared again, his face flushed like he’d just had a shower.

  We were fucked sharing my apartment for the next week.

  After breakfast, I asked Max if he wanted to go sightseeing. I’d purposefully left my diary clear this week in case there were any issues with Diogo and his stay with his family, so I was happy to show Max around.

  We started by going to Belém. I knew Max would enjoy seeing the Tower of Belém and walking along the river toward the Discoveries Monument.

  It was an area I thought had a special energy. The Tower had seen generations of Portuguese kings and conquerors sailing past toward unknown lands.

  Standing there, facing the mouth of the river, all I could see were possibilities: for me, for the world.

  “Are you okay?” Max asked.

  “Yeah, I was just thinking how brave people were back in the day. A lot of the world was uncharted and they still went, not knowing if they’d ever come back. It’s humbling.”

  When I finished, I looked at Max who was staring back at me, a smile on his face.

  “What?” I asked.

  “You’re… never mind,” he shook his head, the smile never leaving him. “Why don’t you take me to that custard tart place you mentioned earlier.”

  On our way to the place that sold the famous Pastéis de Belém, I tried to explain to Max why they weren’t custard tarts even though they looked exactly like them.

  “So you’re saying that the only place that is allowed to call them Pastéis de Belém is this café?”

  “Yes, the original recipe was created by the monks from the Jerónimos Monastery nearby. This family-run factory owns the secret recipe, so they’re the only ones who can call them Pastéis de Belém.”

  Three pastéis later, Max declared they were delicious, but as we sat at a small table surrounded by people, he got close and whispered in my ear that pastéis or tarts, they were all the same to him.

  “Isaac, can I ask you a favor?”

  “Sure.”

  “Would you give me a lift to Caparica? I’d like to see David’s aunt and apologize for the change of plans. She was expecting me to pick up David‘s spare apartment key yesterday.”

  I was more than happy to visit Teresa. It also gave me an opportunity so see Bruno and Filipe.

  Despite what had happened in the past—when Mário kicked me out of David’s apartment—I had a good relationship with Teresa and was glad for the opportunity to use the café as a place for new apprentices.

  I confessed I still hadn’t seen Mário but was sure it was only a matter of time, especially if we turned up unannounced.

  “Do you want to call her and say we’re coming?”

  “No, it might be for the best if I see Mário and get it out of the way. I know he doesn’t have an issue with David anymore, so he shouldn’t have an issue with me.”

  It turned out I’d
been right. Mário was filling up the chiller with drinks when we arrived.

  He stopped when he saw me, all color draining from his face. I guessed he didn’t expect to see me. I wasn’t sure he’d met Max before, either.

  “Boa tarde,” he said, not meeting my gaze. “Teresa is with Bruno in the kitchen. I’ll call them.”

  “Thank you.”

  Max gave my arm a little squeeze.

  “It’s okay. I’m okay,” I said. I wasn’t so sure, but maybe saying it aloud would make it true.

  Filipe was the first to come out from the kitchen area. Still clutching his little Superman doll.

  “Hello,” he said. “Are you coming to help Bruno?”

  I didn’t have a chance to reply because he went around me to face Max who crouched down to Filipe’s level.

  “Are you helping Bruno, too? What’s your name? I’m Filipe, and this is Superman.” Filipe held up the doll to Max’s face, and he nearly fell backward in an attempt to not be stabbed in the eye by Superman’s arm.

  “Hi, Filipe, I’m Max. It’s very nice to meet you. Did you know my best friend used to have a Superman doll just like this?”

  “He doesn’t have it no more?”

  Max shook his head. “No, his Superman went on adventures to help other people that need it the most.”

  Filipe leaned toward Max as though he was telling him a secret, but I could still hear him from where I was standing.

  “Do you think my Superman can help Bruno? He needs help so he can keep me forever.”

  Max looked up at me and I smiled. Filipe was a little whirlwind. It surprised me how much chattier he was today compared to the last time I’d been at the café to see Bruno.

  Bruno came out from the kitchen area holding a carton of juice that he handed to Filipe as he told him to sit at the table and draw on his pad. Teresa and Mário were just behind him.

  “Oh, you must be Max.” Teresa wrapped her arms around him, her head only reaching his chest because she was so petite. Mário extended his hand and also greeted Max.

  “It’s so nice to meet you,” Max said. “David speaks about you all the time, so I feel like I’ve met you before.”

  “It’s nice to meet you, too, dear. How are my boys? Are they eating well? Are they safe? Oh god, I worry so much. The news on the television always talks about these horrible shootings in America, and I get so worried.”

  Max reassured Teresa that both David and Joel were okay and it wouldn’t be long until they were back.

  “The last time I spoke to David on Skype, he told me he was finishing a course. They are planning on traveling a little before coming back,” I added.

  I was looking forward to seeing my friend. He’d been busy before going to Manhattan with Joel, so I hadn’t had a chance to have a proper heart-to-heart. I still felt terrible for the night at the club. When I’d left Max that night, I’d also left David and Joel.

  David and Joel had broken up that night, and even though I knew they were now back together and happy, I still felt selfish. I hadn’t been there for my friend when he really needed someone.

  “Tiago told me you spoke to the family lawyer.” I turned the conversation back to Bruno.

  “I did. He told me it would be difficult to get full custody of Filipe because I’m so young. He said it’s good that I have a job, somewhere to live, and a network around me, but he’s afraid the judge won’t see past my age.”

  I’d thought about it and also wondered if it would be the case, but I hadn’t wanted to say anything to Bruno until he’d spoken to the lawyer.

  “Did the lawyer suggest a solution? Surely having Filipe back in an abusive household is worse.”

  “Yes, Filipe’s teacher called me to the school two days ago. Apparently, he’d been disruptive in class for a while but his behavior had changed. She’d noticed it was since I started picking him up, so she asked if Filipe was living with me.” Teresa put a reassuring arm around Bruno as small tears fell down his cheek. He cleared them before Filipe could see he was upset.

  “Apparently, when one of the other children touched Filipe’s back, he cried in pain, so his teacher took him to one of the other teachers who used to be a nurse. He had some really bad bruising on his back. He said he’d been naughty and had been playing where he wasn’t supposed to.”

  Teresa intervened to finish the story.

  “I was with Bruno when he saw the lawyer. This evidence from the school could help to sway the decision from the judge.”

  Teresa looked up at Bruno, who despite being shorter than me was still taller than Teresa, and caressed his face before hugging him. Then she looked at Mário.

  I stopped in my tracks at her next statement.

  “We’re going to adopt Bruno and Filipe.”

  I saw in Teresa’s eyes this was a decision they hadn’t made lightly. David had told me once years ago how they couldn’t have children. Maybe they saw this as their opportunity, especially now that David had started a new life with Joel.

  We stayed in the café for a little longer, hearing about all the adventures Filipe’s Superman went on while he was asleep at night. I told Teresa that Max was staying with me so he wouldn’t need David’s apartment keys after all.

  She gave me a knowing look before we parted, but it was Mário’s words that floored me.

  “Isaac, I haven’t had a chance to apologize to you. There is nothing that can excuse how I behaved toward you that night at David’s apartment. I will have to live with the knowledge I caused you so much pain for the rest of my life.

  “Life dealt you a shitty hand; you made the best of it, and look where you are now. You are a much better man than I’ll ever be. I’m so sorry, son. I truly am.”

  24

  Max

  As I chased Isaac down the road, I wondered what had gone so wrong that he’d nearly run out of the café. He hadn’t been rude or anything. He’d said his goodbyes to Teresa, Bruno, and Filipe. I saw Mário say something, too, but I couldn’t catch it because Filipe asked if I could make him and Superman fly high in the sky.

  The little boy had been so excited at being lifted up over my head that he’d been screaming in delight.

  I wondered if Mário had said something that had upset Isaac.

  He was heading toward the beach, so once I caught up, I walked silently beside him until we reached the sand.

  I thought Isaac might want to walk off whatever he was upset about, so it surprised me when he took his shoes and socks off and walked a few feet in the sand until he came to a stop and sat down.

  I sat behind him, placing my legs on either side of his, and pulled him into my chest.

  “What’s wrong?” I said in his ear.

  He leaned back into my chest and sighed.

  “I don’t know. Lots of things. I’m so frustrated, Max.”

  “Talk to me. What’s frustrating you?”

  “Bruno’s situation. Can he just have a fucking break? His grandparents stopped him seeing his little brother because they didn’t want him to be a bad influence, but when it suited them, they were happy to have Bruno look after him full time. Bruno works so damn hard. Trust me. David wouldn’t have shared the secret recipe for his custard tarts unless Bruno had earned it.”

  “You mentioned a lawyer earlier.”

  “We have a few lawyers that specialize in family law who volunteer for us and do some pro bono work.”

  “I’m sure they’ll do whatever they can for Bruno and Filipe. Is that all that’s upsetting you?”

  “Yes.” He paused. “No.”

  I wrapped my arms around him until both our arms crossed in front of him and I used my thumbs to caress his skin.

  “Mário apologized. I knew he probably would, so it didn’t come as a surprise. I saw it in his eyes; he is genuinely sorry for how he treated me all those years ago.”

  “It’s hard to forget, isn’t it?”

  “Yes.”

  We sat on the beach in that same positi
on watching the sun getting lower and lower on the horizon.

  “Can I buy you dinner?” I asked. “Joel took me to this amazing seafood restaurant when I was here last time.”

  Isaac turned his face to me, and I couldn’t resist caressing his stubble and placing a soft kiss on his lips.

  “Actually…” He blushed a beautiful shade of pink that made his already tan skin look even more appetizing, and I knew I had to make sure that despite the occasional kiss, we wouldn’t fall back into more than friends.

  “Actually?”

  “My brother invited us to have dinner with them.”

  “Us.” Fuck, how I loved the sound of that.

  “He knows you’re here, so when he told me to come over for dinner, he said to bring you along. I mean, you don’t have to go...we don’t have to go. I have dinner with them all the time, so it’s no big deal. I mean, Joana is making her mom’s Portuguese stew, which apparently is the best thing you’ve tasted but—”

  “It’s not.”

  “What?”

  “It’s not, I mean, it won’t be the best thing I’ve ever tasted.”

  “Oh, yeah, I guess you’ve been spoiled by David in the last few months.”

  “Nope, it’s not David’s food. You, Isaac. You’re the best thing I’ve ever tasted.”

  His lips crashed into mine, taking my breath away. I’m not sure how he managed to turn completely around to face me without breaking the kiss. My brain was short-circuiting to a point that I wouldn’t know my name.

  There were no coherent thoughts, just the feel of Isaac’s lips pressed against mine, his gentle biting, and his seeking tongue. Fuck.

  A whistle and some cheering got us adding a few inches between us.

  Isaac’s eyes were lidded like he was being consumed by lust and had forgotten where he was. When they finally focused on mine, he stared for a moment, running his hands across my short hair.

  “Why did you have it cut?”

  “For different reasons, mostly practical, but also whenever I looked at myself in the mirror, I saw your hands running through it, and it was too painful to think about. I didn’t know if I would ever see you again.”