Crossing the Wide Forever

by Missouri Vaun

  Chapter Fourteen

  The days aboard the steamship were marked by regular intervals between mealtime and the leisure time that followed. Days followed a set schedule for passengers. Lillie spent some of her free time sketching or writing letters to her family and to Caroline that she’d mail once they arrived safely in Independence. Any other free time she usually managed to find Cody for a stroll around the deck, or a leisure chat while seated on one of the long benches that bordered the main cabin facing the river view.

  It was late morning when she found Cody near the aft railing, looking down at the water churned up by the big wheel. It was too noisy so they moved to the other side of the deck. The tree lined bank slid slowly past as the boat lumbered upriver at an unhurried pace.

  “Lillie, I wanted to talk with you about something.” The serious look on Cody’s face made Lillie worry about what she might say.

  “Is something wrong?”

  “No, I mean, yes, but it’s not what you might think.” Cody turned to face her. “Last night, when I was trying to fall asleep, well, I couldn’t stop thinking about you.”

  That sounded nice. Where was the problem with that? Lillie waited for Cody to continue. She seemed to be struggling with what she wanted to say.

  “What I mean is, I couldn’t stop thinking about you and worrying that you don’t really know what you’re getting into.”

  “You were worrying about me?”

  “I don’t want to upset you by saying this, and I’m certainly not trying to boss you.” Lillie smothered a laugh. Cody had obviously spent enough time with her to know she didn’t appreciate being told what to do.

  “Friendly advice is always welcome, Cody.”

  “I’m glad to hear that.” Cody removed her hat and ran her hand through her hair. Her eyes practically sparkled in the direct sunlight, and Lillie’s heart registered her intense gaze. “Lillie, you’re from the city. You’ve never had any experience living in the wilderness and I’ve been fretting about that. You may not understand what you’re getting yourself into, and that scares me…for you.”

  Lillie’s heart practically swelled with emotion. Cody was thinking about her. Cody was worried about her.

  “It’s funny that you bring this up, because I’ve been thinking the same thing.”

  “You have?”

  Now seemed like the right time to share her possibly crazy idea with Cody. The idea she’d been mulling over ever since Nan had introduced the notion the previous day.

  “I have an idea. Would you like to hear it?” Lillie tilted her head and gave Cody a sideways look.

  “Sure, what’s your idea?”

  “I think we should get married.”

  Cody almost fell over. Her mouth was open, but nothing came out. Finally, she managed one raspy word. “What?”

  Lillie almost laughed at the look of shock or possibly fear on Cody’s face when she’d voiced her idea aloud. But Cody hadn’t turned and run away, so that was a good sign. Maybe this idea had merit after all, especially if it benefited them both.

  “Listen, I don’t want to get married, I mean, not to a man. Part of why I decided to travel to Kansas was to be independent. Hopefully, in a way that I haven’t been able to be independent in New York.” Lillie tried to read Cody’s expression as she talked, but she couldn’t tell what she was thinking. “I think we could help each other.”

  “You’re serious.” It was a statement, not a question.

  “Yes, I’m serious. Cody, you look like a man. Everyone thinks you’re a man. Even I didn’t suspect and I’ve been physically close to you.” Granted, given more time she might have figured things out, but if they were married then no one would have the sort of personal access to Cody that Lillie did. “I believe that two people protecting your secret would surely be more convincing than one. If you have a wife everyone will certainly assume that you are a man. No one would question your sex.”

  Cody rubbed her face with her hands and slowly exhaled.

  “You really think we could get married?”

  “Yes, I do. And I’m sure the captain would perform the ceremony before we even get to Independence.” He’d already performed two ceremonies for couples who’d met during the brief voyage. Excitement began to build in Lillie’s chest. She could tell that Cody’s mood had changed. She seemed lighter somehow. Lillie could see a difference in her countenance.

  “Lillie, have you really thought this through?”

  “Well, not completely. I was hoping you’d help me with the details. But I was thinking that we are both planning to head west by wagon, why not travel together and offer each other the safety of companionship? I realize safety might be more of a concern for me than it is for you in your current disguise, but we could travel together until we reach my uncle’s place in Kansas. Maybe you could help me get started there, show me the ropes a bit, and then you could continue on to California.” She took Cody’s hand, like she’d do with any of her girlfriends back East, although, somehow this felt different. Cody looked down at their entwined fingers. “You’d be free to leave whenever you were ready. I know you’re anxious to find your brothers.”

  “I can see how this helps me, but does this really help you? You should get something out of this arrangement too.”

  “Well, I don’t know anything about outfitting a wagon or driving a yoke of oxen or camping in the open…” Lillie suddenly wondered if this arrangement would end up being terribly unequal because she realized if she thought about it, she could list even more things she didn’t know. Cody would bear the brunt of teaching her many things during their journey across the plains.

  “I guess I see how this would be good for you, for us. I understand.”

  “Cody, I hope you need me as much as I need you. I truly believe we can help each other.”

  *

  They wasted no time putting their plan in motion. Cody made arrangements with the captain after lunch and he agreed to perform the marriage later that evening. The wedding ceremony was simple and sincere, just the way Lillie would have wanted it to be even if it had been real.

  Griffin and Nan stood as witnesses to the event, and the captain read the vows that she and Cody repeated. Cody had offered her mother’s wedding ring as a token of their union, and luckily, it fit Lillie’s finger perfectly. When Cody kissed her lightly on the lips to seal their vows, it had been just as sweet as their first kiss. And Lillie had visions of more kisses in their future.

  The ship’s head cook made a single-layer yellow cake large enough for any who wanted to join in the celebration of their union. Edward took a slice but sulked in a corner while he ate it. Lillie reveled in the notion that not only had she utterly ignored Edward’s admonishment to stay away from Cody, she’d rubbed it in his face by marrying Cody within days of their argument.

  Lillie felt so free.

  Her mother had pestered her about marriage back East, and now that she was out from under her mother’s strict oversight, she’d willingly gone and gotten herself a husband, the best sort of husband in her opinion, a husband in name only. A husband that would never meet with her mother’s approval, which made it even more fun. This thread of thought amused her. Lillie had obviously tapped into some deep-seated rebellious tendency that she didn’t even know she had.

  Cody was a wee bit nervous about all the attention, but seemed to be taking it mostly in stride. Toasts were made, cake was eaten, dinner served, and darkness had fallen before they were able to retire to Lillie’s cabin.

  They’d moved Cody’s things into Lillie’s room because now that they were married they could share quarters without reproach. Cody didn’t have much, just two saddlebags and a blanket. Cody would no longer have to sleep on a thin mattress on the hard deck.

  Lillie flopped onto the bunk along the wall, exhausted but happy. She closed her eyes and sighed, allowing her tired muscles to relax. She heard a scuffling noise and opened her eyes to see Cody settling onto the narrow bit of floor space
next to the bed.

  “What are you doing?” Lillie leaned over the side of the bed and looked down at Cody.

  “I was getting ready to go to sleep.” Cody folded her jacket under her head for a pillow.

  “Aren’t you going to sleep in the bed?”

  “Um, I’m not sure we know each other well enough.” Candlelight flickered across Cody’s face.

  “That’s a very silly thing to say to a girl you just married.”

  Cody laughed. “I suppose you’re right.”

  “Come now, there’s plenty of room. I won’t be able to sleep if I know you’re sleeping on the hard floor.” Lillie got up and started to unbutton her dress.

  Cody realized Lillie was getting undressed and quickly shuffled to her feet. There was nowhere to go in the small space so Cody turned to face the wall and nervously crossed her arms in front of her chest. Why was she so on edge? She’d seen girls undressed before. Damn it all, she was a girl. But she couldn’t help feeling that this whole situation with Lillie was somehow different from anything she’d experienced before and that this arrangement between them was about more than just the need for travel companionship.

  Thankfully, Lillie didn’t make fun of her shyness or joke about the fact that she was probably blushing. Her cheeks felt like they were flaming hot.

  “I’ve got my nightgown on. You can turn around now.”

  “Sorry. I don’t know why, but I felt I should give you some privacy.”

  “It’s okay. We just aren’t used to being roommates yet. I’m sure the nervousness will pass.”

  So maybe Lillie was nervous too. Somehow knowing that made Cody relax a little.

  “You should get ready for bed too. You’re not going to sleep in your clothes are you?” Lillie pulled the covering on the bed back and climbed in, scooting close to the wall to make space for Cody.

  “No, I reckon not.” Cody faced away from Lillie again and stripped down to her undershirt and undershorts. She didn’t have a nightgown. In fact, she’d basically been sleeping in her clothes every night.

  She climbed on the narrow mattress and rolled on her side so that her back was curled up against Lillie. She could feel Lillie’s soft curves pressing against her, the warmth of her body seeped through Cody’s thin undershirt. This felt good. It felt cozy and safe to be all snuggled up together.

  Lillie draped her arm around Cody’s waist, and she entwined her fingers with Lillie’s. She felt her mother’s ring on Lillie’s finger and Lillie’s breath on the back of her neck. She inhaled deeply and let it out slowly. She hoped Lillie was right about the nervousness passing, but she wasn’t so sure.

  “Good night, Cody,” Lillie said softly.

  “Good night, Lillie.”

  Chapter Fifteen

  As the steamer stopped along the bank, closer to Independence, to take on its last load of wood for the engine, it was flooded with circulars and pamphlets by couriers boosting the new territory. The excitement in the air was almost palpable.

  Everyone aboard the steamship showed signs that they were glad the journey was coming to an end, and yet the trip upriver had brought the emigrants together, regardless of their differences, like one big family.

  Cody held Lillie’s hand as they walked down the gangway from the boat to the dock. They’d arrived at the western edge of Missouri along with a teeming throng of fellow emigrants who seemed to be from all walks of life. Independence, Missouri, was obviously a prosperous city, catering to and outfitting pioneers. Cody had been told that trains of wagons left several times a week for the Oregon and Santa Fe Trails, which split off from one another forty miles southwest of Independence at Gardner Junction.

  As they arrived, mud from spring rains made the streets a mess. Women lifted the hem of their skirts just enough to keep them from sinking into the mire. Mexicans and Indians roamed the streets around the docking ships along with Santa Fe traders. A cadre of young men worked as porters and dockhands, unloading gear and livestock.

  After arranging with a porter to deliver their luggage and see to Cody’s horse, they were given directions for Mr. Noland’s hotel, the largest hotel in Independence. As a matter of fact, it was the largest hotel in Missouri outside of St. Louis and could accommodate as many as four hundred guests at one time.

  The boat had docked early in the day, so they’d decided to check into the hotel and then Lillie wanted to visit the attorney’s office. There were final details to work through in terms of settling her uncle’s estate.

  The clerk at the front desk of the hotel gave them directions to the office of Mr. Clark Taylor, attorney-at-law. The two-story building was within a five-minute walk along the main thoroughfare. Planks of lumber had been used to create makeshift footbridges across the worst of the mud near the front of the office. Cody watched Lillie gracefully maneuver across the uneven boards with her skirt in her hands. Cody scraped the worst of the mud from the street off her boots against the edge of the porch boards and then followed Lillie inside.

  “May I help you, miss?” Cody assumed the young man speaking to Lillie was a lawyer or clerk, based on his suit, although he didn’t look much older than she was.

  “I’d like to speak with Mr. Taylor if he’s available.” Lillie brushed at the front of her dress to smooth it down.

  “May I say who’s inquiring?”

  “Lillie Ellis Walsh.” She tilted her head slightly and smiled at Cody.

  Cody felt that smile all the way to her toes. She’d introduced herself as Lillie Ellis Walsh. That was the first time Cody had heard Lillie say such a thing, and hearing the joining of their names created warmth in her middle that spread outward. Cody felt grateful that the man had already turned his back and gone to inquire after Mr. Taylor, because she was sure she was blushing.

  “Take your hat off,” whispered Lillie.

  “Oh, right.” Cody removed her hat and ran her fingers through her hair to tame it. She was still getting the hang of the customs of being a gentleman. Lillie’s gentle and affectionately delivered coaching from time to time was appreciated.

  The man who’d greeted them returned with another man who was quite a bit older. He had thinning gray hair and a bushy brow behind wire-rimmed spectacles. Actually, he may have had more hair in his eyebrows than on top of his head. Mr. Taylor was a bit shorter than Cody and generously rounded about his midsection.

  “Mrs. Walsh, so glad to make your acquaintance.” He extended his hand to Lillie. “And you must be Mr. Walsh.”

  “Nice to meet you, Mr. Taylor.” Cody shook his hand.

  “Please, follow me. We can talk in my office.”

  Mr. Taylor’s office wasn’t elegant, but it was definitely comfortable. Two leather-covered chairs faced a large oak desk. Soot stains created a dark halo on the tongue and groove wood paneling around two lanterns mounted on the wall behind the desk. The faintest scent of cigar smoke lingered in the air. Mr. Taylor motioned toward a decanter on a small table on the far side of his office.

  “Can I offer you a drink, Mr. Walsh?”

  “No, thanks, I’m fine.”

  “Smart man. Good to keep your wits about you when talking business.” Mr. Taylor smiled good-naturedly and positioned himself in a large rolling chair behind the desk. “Please, sit.”

  “I must admit, Mrs. Walsh, I’m very relieved to see you with a husband.”

  “I beg your pardon?” Lillie visibly stiffened in the chair next to Cody.

  “What I mean is, I was concerned about a young woman attempting to assume ownership of this property and manage it alone.” He leaned his elbows on the desk and interlocked his fingers. “The frontier can be a harsh place. I was worried about your safety.”

  “Oh, I understand.” Lillie cleared her throat. “Mr. Walsh and I have only just been married. I’m sorry that I was unable to inform you of my changed situation before we arrived.”

  “Well, my sincere congratulations. You make a very handsome couple indeed. Now, let us address the bus
iness at hand.” Mr. Taylor pulled some papers from a file drawer behind his desk and began to shuffle through them.

  Lillie smiled and seemed to visibly relax. Cody was still feeling just a wee bit exposed under the elder attorney’s astute attention, but he seemed to accept Cody as Lillie’s husband so she willed herself to accept it too.

  It took roughly an hour to go through all the estate documentation. Lillie was given the remaining cash in her uncle’s accounts, the deed to the property, and a map. In addition to the map, Mr. Taylor gave them a list of local merchants who could be trusted to help them outfit a wagon for a fair price. They were just finishing up when the man who’d first greeted them knocked softly and stuck his head in the door.

  “Sorry to bother you, sir, but the new attorney has arrived.”

  “I just need another minute here. Show him to his office and tell him I’ll be with him directly.”

  “Yes, sir.”

  Mr. Taylor organized the papers and tucked them into a folder. He tied the stringed flap down and handed the whole business to Lillie.

  “Thank you, Mr. Taylor, for everything.”

  Cody and Lillie stood as Mr. Taylor rounded the desk to shake their hands once more. “It was my pleasure to help such a charming young couple start their new life together. Your uncle would be most proud. He was a fine person and he will be missed.”

  Mr. Taylor ushered them toward the outer office. Cody was just replacing her hat when a familiar face seeped into her peripheral vision, Edward Franklin.

  “Before you leave, allow me to introduce you to our office’s newest attorney. Mr. Franklin, this is Mr. and Mrs. Walsh.”

  There was an awkward silence for an instant before Lillie spoke. “Mr. Franklin, what a pleasure to see you again.”

  “The pleasure is all mine.” Edward stiffly bowed ever so slightly.