Killing Freedom

by Ryan Casey

  He aimed his gun and counted to three.

  One. Two. Three.

  He lifted the lid of the coffin and shoved the gun inside.

  A small snake hissed and shot its head up towards him. Jared lept back. Just a snake. Just a little snake that had got in there and got stuck. That must’ve been what he’d caught a glimpse of before. He poked his head over the side of the grave again. The snake was small, but it had startled him as it slithered across Gurdit’s dead body. It had little brown marks on its side and a cobra-esque hood.

  That’s when he took a closer look at the thing he’d seen glistening in the sunlight down there earlier.

  It was resting on Gurdit’s chest, directly opposite the snake’s head. The sense of foreboding intensified in Jared’s stomach. He knew what it was. This was no accident, surely not.

  Jared waited for the snake to turn its head in the other direction and threw his hands in, wrapping them around its neck so that it couldn’t bite him. He held the snake down as he slipped his fingers around the item, pulling it towards him. He let go of the snake and brought his other arm back, closing the lid of Gurdit’s grave as the snake hissed and struggled.

  Jared’s heart felt like it was imploding as he stared at the item in the palm of his hand.

  ‘What is it?’

  Cindy’s voice, somewhere behind him. Or maybe in front of him. Nothing made sense anymore.

  There was no mistaking it. There was nothing he could do about it.

  ‘Nothing. Just a snake,’ Jared said, turning over to her and smiling as she stood by the truck. He needed to see. He just needed to see the side of her head to confirm his fears. ‘Would you mind just popping inside and grabbing my bag by the door?’

  Cindy nodded and reluctantly walked back towards the house. Nothing reflected in her ear. One step, two steps. Nothing there. All this time. All this time, fucking with him, fucking with them all.

  His uncle. His sister. Gurdit. All this time.

  Jared held the earring up in the air, letting it glint in the sun again like it had when they’d pulled up in the truck for the very first time, like it had in the market when they bumped into the suit. There was no other way Cindy’s earring could’ve gotten down there. There was no more room for coincidences.

  Gurdit was right about her.

  Jared’s footsteps were heavy as he walked back towards the house. It was as if he were walking across the surface of the moon, stuck in slow-motion. The earring. There had to be a reason. There had to be an answer for why it was there. There was always an answer.

  He reached into his pocket again, a small naïve part of his brain praying it was all in his imagination. But no—the sharp tip of the earring pricked into his finger. She’d stolen the key. She’d written the notes. She was fucking with them all along.

  He stood behind Cindy, who had her back to him. Her brown hair lay flat against her head, arms raised to her mouth. She was saying things, muttering words of confusion and bewilderment, but they were just noises. Distracting noises.

  Deep breath.

  ‘I mean, which way do we head? Maybe we should ring the police now, Jared.’

  One…

  ‘I know you said it’s not safe but—’

  Two…

  The butt of the gun cracked against her head.

  Her body fell towards the ground, and she was silent.

  Three.

  Exhale.

  Chapter Twenty-Six

  Jared’s hands shook as he clutched onto the butt of the gun. He looked at her body, outstretched in front of him on the ground. Her head would bruise, there was no getting away from that, but she’d made her choice. He had to deal with things professionally. He was a professional.

  He lifted her body up, the muscles in his legs almost giving way, and rested it on one of the wooden chairs he’d brought in from around the dining table. She’d probably wake up soon. He’d hit the top of her head with enough force to shock her brain into sudden unconsciousness, but it wouldn’t last long. He needed something—duct tape, yes, duct tape.

  Jared walked into the kitchen and scrambled around the drawers for tape. It took him three drawers before he finally found it, as well as another package. It was addressed to Jared, but whoever was writing it hadn’t quite finished his name yet. He picked it up and shook his head. Hidden in plain sight. Faith was right, right from the start. Cindy was onto them. She was responsible for Gurdit’s death and she was responsible for compromising their location. Stupid, stupid. Gurdit’s death was for nothing. It was his fault.

  ‘You’ll never stop looking over your shoulder.’

  He slipped open the envelope as he walked back into the living room—a videotape fell out into his hand. Strange. Wonder when this was intended for? They’d have to find out together.

  Jared placed the tape on top of the telly before sitting in front of Cindy’s unconscious body. He twisted her arms behind the chair and began to wrap the silver duct tape around her wrists. Hands that had squeezed warm water onto his head the night before.

  Just a victim. Just a target. Nothing more. Nothing.

  When he reached for her head, he noticed the little dimple in her left ear where the earring was missing. He held up the one he’d found in his pocket and examined the earring in her right ear—there was a chance, wasn’t there? Maybe this was all just a big mistake. He’d have to explain things to her. She’d understand in time.

  Wouldn’t she?

  His stomach sank as he looked at the two earrings: identical. Small and silver, with a white diamond in the center, probably imitation glass, no mistaking. He put it back into his pocket. Explaining would be hard now anyway. It was her turn to do the explaining.

  She mumbled something. Shit. He dropped one of her arms in a fumble and lifted it back up again, trying to tie it to the chair. If only she’d just gone along with everything. If she’d just let things happen, then everything would’ve been okay.

  Jared stepped over towards the videotape and slipped it into the player.

  When he turned round again, Cindy’s eyes were open.

  Cindy frowned and looked around the room, still dazed. Her eyes blinked rapidly as she searched for some kind of answer—some kind of excuse. ‘Jared… what—what happened?’

  Jared’s chest rattled with the nerves. No—it should feel like this. She’s just another victim. Just another in a long line of victims.

  ‘I want to know everything about who you work for and what you’re planning, Cindy,’ Jared said.

  She narrowed her eyes, her breathing becoming progressively more frenetic as she looked up at Jared. ‘Wha—what?’

  ‘Don’t give me any shit,’ Jared said, walking towards her. He grabbed Cindy by the jaw and looked her in the eyes. ‘Just tell me, alright? Just tell me it as it is. Can you do that?’

  Jared felt Cindy’s damp tears roll down onto his hands. ‘I… I thought you—I thought you were on my side? I thought you were on Brian’s side? Please, I just want… I just want to go back. Please.’

  Jared roughly released her face. ‘I’ve seen the note. To be honest, things didn’t seem right then, but I gave you the benefit of the doubt.’ He reached into his pocket and pulled out the earring as Cindy continued to whimper, her eyes scanning the room. ‘Look what I found down in the grave this afternoon.’

  Cindy’s pained eyes looked at the earring, her jaw dangling and shaking. ‘Jared, I—’

  ‘And the videotape, in the post?’ he said, pointing over towards the set. ‘What’s that about? Addressed to me. Who are you working for, Cindy? Do you think I don’t fucking see these things?’

  ‘Jared, I’m not—I’m not—please—’

  ‘Let’s watch your tape together, shall we?’ Jared said, as Cindy whimpered, tears dripping off the bottom of her chin.

  ‘No, Jared, please, I—’

  ‘Shut up,’ he said, before crouching down to the video player and pressing play.

  The eruption of sound
was the first thing to catch his attention.

  Carnival music. Bright images and children’s cartoon characters speaking in slow motion. An octopus wrapping its tentacles around another character who exploded with a slapstick ‘pop.’

  And then again. And again.

  Jared turned to face Cindy. ‘What does… what’s this?’

  Cindy’s eyes were wide. They stared at him with fear. He could see her fists were clenched together. She was nodding at him.

  Or something behind him.

  The hairs on Jared’s arms rose when he saw what it was.

  A man was stood outside the window. He was bald, and his eyes were wide and bloodshot.

  ‘I see him watching me at night.’

  Before Jared had the chance to react, the man ran.

  Jared turned away from the television and reached into his pocket for his gun.

  ‘Jared, please, I—’

  ‘We’ll sort this out later,’ Jared said, before running out of the lounge area and out into the outdoors as Cindy continued to shout and scream.

  What did it mean?

  The man sprinted away over the fields. It was impossible to hide. Jared pursued him like a cheetah, spit dripping down his chin as he exhaled and inhaled rhythmically. There was no getting away. He’d done this a thousand times. There was no getting away.

  Predator and prey. That was how it always had been.

  Predator.

  Prey.

  He saw himself getting closer to the man, whose silver coat glistened in the hot glare of the sun. Carnival music and cartoon images played out in his mind. He was like the octopus chasing the boat. He was closing in. It’d been a while since he’d hunted, properly anyway.

  He raised his gun, aimed it at the man’s back, and fired.

  The gunshot cracked through the air for miles as the ground swallowed the man up.

  Jared jogged over to where the man’s body had disappeared. It was weird that he’d even thought he could get away. Had Cindy sent for him? Or was he just on his own? He was out of the picture now anyway, whoever he was.

  Jared slowed down as he approached the man. Something looked unusual about him as he crouched down beside him, the blood seeping out of his back. Jared threw the man’s body onto its back. His dying eyes looked up at Jared as his mouth battled to let out some final words. He reached his frail hand towards his jacket pocket, one last ditch attempt to save himself with whatever was in there.

  ‘I don’t fucking think so,’ Jared said, before twisting his gun around onto its side and cracking it against the man’s skull.

  Then again.

  And again, each crack echoing through the air. Bastard. Crack. Fucker. Crack.

  Jared fell back exhaling and panting as the warm blood coated his hand. All the weight and all the tension of the last few days completely evaporated. Relief. A relief to get it done with.

  What did that make him?

  He took a few moments to compose himself before unzipping the man’s coat, trying to ignore the mashed up mess that was his skull. He’d take his weapon, find out a bit about him.

  As he unzipped the coat, his stomach sank towards the ground when he saw the writing.

  The man had an I.D. tag wrapped around his neck, car keys resting in his pocket. He was a doctor. Doctor Rogers.

  But that wasn’t what rattled Jared the most. He tried to process it, tried to get his head around it as he jolted to his feet and sprinted back in the direction of the house, blood still trickling down his arm.

  ‘Cindy!’ he shouted. Fuck. He should’ve seen through this. He should’ve been ready for this, after everything. Where did it leave him now?

  He tried to think. A hundred scenarios ran through his head. But whatever he tried, he couldn’t get the writing, etched across poor Doctor Rogers’ chest, out of his mind.

  HOPE YOU ENJOYED THE LITTLE FILM. R.

  And then a sole earring, nestled in a newly bought case, a perfect opposite of the one he had found earlier.

  Jared sprinted in through the door, which rested against the latch. His mind raced with all sorts of theories. The earring. Why hadn’t he checked it more closely? How had he let this happen?

  ‘Cindy,’ he called, as he stepped further into the house. There was a silence in the air, the crackling of white noise from the television. He reached for his gun with his clammy, bloody hand. He couldn’t take any more chances.

  He walked up to the tall lounge door. The crackling of the static from the videotape. Voices beneath the static. Crying.

  Cartoon octopuses and carnival music.

  He pushed the door open.

  Cindy sat tied to the chair where Jared had left her. She was staring directly in front of her at the television. Jared exhaled. She’s okay.

  But there was something different. Something about the room. Something in her eyes, the way they bulged in the direction of the telly. The way she was completely still like an imperfect doll.

  Jared looked over at the television and dropped his gun towards the floor.

  The sight of the bullet hitting Carl’s head, time and time again.

  The sight of Jared, watching it all unfold.

  And the children. Burma. Fires. Screams.

  No. Don’t look. Don’t listen. That’s done with. It’s in the past.

  ‘Please, please daddy.’

  No.

  The toy Ferrari dropping towards the floor.

  Carnival music and hysterical cartoon characters.

  Frank’s video recording from the night at the house. Frank’s video recording.

  Cindy looked up at Jared as he rushed over to turn the television off. The room was silent. He couldn’t look her in the eye, not now that she knew what he was.

  ‘Cindy, I—’

  Her jaw rattled as she watched him in total fear. He walked over to her and kneeled down opposite. He had to explain. He had to apologise.

  ‘I swear I—’

  ‘You were part of it, you were… All this fucking time and it was your fault, you fucking, evil, fucking—’

  ‘Cindy, I didn’t want to—’

  ‘Let me go, let me go—’

  Jared’s head spun. If he let her go, she’d go to the police. It would be over. He’d be on the run again, on the run from everything and Raymond wouldn’t be here to support him this time.

  ‘HOPE YOU ENJOYED THE LITTLE FILM.’

  Jared curled his head into his hands and rubbed them against his face. He just wanted to be free. He just wanted a normal life with people he cared for. He just wanted… he just wanted this. Was that too much to ask for?

  Cindy’s muffled screams and shouts echoed against his ears.

  ‘I am so sorry,’ Jared said, underneath his breath.

  ‘Get me out, get me out now, just—please, I’ll do anything, just let me go.’

  He looked at Cindy again. Her whole body shook, and her eyes flew around his face, distant and unknowing. That was the look that did it for him. The way she looked at him. That was the look that made him realise that there was nothing else he could do, not now.

  The way they all looked at him before he killed them. That look of knowledge of the monster within.

  Jared nodded and took a deep breath before cutting the tape around Cindy’s chapped wrists. She pulled her arm back out of his way when one became free, panting fast like a dog as he untied the other.

  Then, he untied her left foot.

  And then the right.

  He waited for the blow. He waited for her to throw herself at him as he clenched his eyes together and curled in a ball on the ground, but it didn’t come.

  ‘I just don’t know why?’ Cindy said. She stood at the door, rubbing her arms, shaking. ‘Just why, Jared?’

  He looked up at her, and their eyes met for a brief moment. She still had that look in her eyes. That look of fear. Of knowing. The look they always had.

  ‘I just want you to know how sorry I am and that I never meant things to
happen like this,’ he said. He looked up at her again.

  She shook her head and coughed in disbelief. ‘You came into our house. You ruined our family. I knew there was something wrong all along, but then I stupidly bought into this whole being in danger thing and you… you said the right things, and I guess I just got carried away. What was in it for you, Jared? That’s what I don’t understand. What did you have to gain from this? At least have the dignity to answer me.’

  He wiped his face and rose to his feet, letting the words pour out of his mouth like helium from a burst balloon. ‘I—I wanted you. I wanted you and me and Faith and Carl and Brian. I wanted us to get away and have a happy life but… but things didn’t work out. And I saw a chance for a fresh start and I panicked. I panicked, okay? And now, my sister, she—she’s gone. And my uncle, well, he—he won’t let me back. And I’ve killed a lot of people, Cindy. I’ve killed so many people. I just want to be free.’

  Cindy watched him closely through every word, analysing his mouth for some sort of comprehensible answer for why all this had to be happening. For one hopeful moment, he thought he saw a glimmer of pity in her eyes.

  ‘I—I think I need to go. I need to go. Please, just let me go. It’s all I ask. I won’t—I won’t say anything. I just need to go.’

  Jared felt the heat mounting behind his eyes. All he’d ever wanted was for things to be okay, to look out for someone, and now that chance was gone. He just had to trust her. That’s all he’d had to fucking do, and he’d failed at that, too. He nodded his head and walked towards her. She cowered around the door.

  He pulled the front door open and sniffed, wiping the moisture from his cheek. He couldn’t look at her, not anymore. He had to distance himself. He had to forget.

  ‘Just—just walk across the field. You’ll hit the highway eventually and… Cindy, I’m sorry. You don’t have to do this.’ He reached out to grab her hand, and she pulled it out of the way before scuttling across the dusty pebbles in front of the house. She walked with a limp, desperate to get as far away as she could. He knew it was almost time. He knew he had to let her go now. There was nothing else he could do about it.