Hawk

by Belle, Kimberly I.

  “Hannah, I’m so sorry this happened to you,” Hawk says as he holds me.

  “It’s not your fault, Hawk. They are monsters. I’m glad you found me and I’m glad you’re here,” I croak out. My voice is raspy and my throat is raw.

  “Is there anything I can get you?” He asks.

  “No, you just holding me is enough. I feel safe here. Your smell comforts me and your warmth,” I say settling into his arms more listening to his heartbeat steadily then falling asleep.

  Chapter 15

  Hawk

  I can’t believe everything we just went through, especially Hannah. Ten of my men were injured while rescuing Hannah. One of the guys on the inside Reaper said he spotted Hannah in their presidents room. As soon as he called me, we rode over. There was no hesitation, the fucks needed to die and that’s what we did. We had an all-out fight with the Devil’s Daddies. We managed to dismantle everything they had and got rid of their leadership and those who wouldn’t surrender. We left Reaper in charge while we figure out what to do with the place.

  When I found Hannah, their disgusting pig of a President was fucking her while she was passed out. He was pouring whiskey on the cuts he made into her beautiful skin. I will never forget how she looked on that bed. Injured and helpless. I didn’t give him a chance, I shot the fuck straight in the middle of the forehead. As soon as it was safe, I had Jimmy carry Hannah out to the van and we headed straight to the clubhouse.

  Doc fixed her up. I know physically she will be okay but mentally she’s going to need time, patience, and someone to talk to. I might need someone to talk to as well. Finding her being raped and injured really affected me.

  I was with Hannah in triage, she fell asleep after waking up for a little. Jen came by and sat with her while I took care of some club business. I don’t want Hannah waking up and being alone. Doc agreed as well. I’m walking back to triage and can hear Hannah talking. I walk inside and find her up and looking a little better. Doc is checking on a few things.

  “How’s she doing, Doc?” I ask.

  “Hey Pres.” Doc says.

  “She’s doing good,” Hannah answers.

  “I see you’re awake now. Can I get you anything?” I ask.

  “Food,” Hannah says.

  “Where’s Jen?” I ask. She was supposed to stay with her.

  “She said she received a call from the tattoo shop and had to run. Is the lockdown over?” Hannah asks.

  “It sure is. All the families have gone back home. It’s just us regular guys left,” I reply.

  “I wouldn’t say your regular Hawk. I can’t wait to get back home and sleep in a familiar bed,” Hannah says.

  I’m saddened she wants to leave so soon.

  “Well. You can’t leave just yet. I need to monitor you overnight,” Doc says.

  “Really Doc? I really didn’t want to sleep in this bed. It’s pretty uncomfortable,” she says shifting her body.

  “I mean, I could set you in one of leaderships bedrooms. I had the builders build in medical equipment behind the beds,” Doc replies.

  “You did?” Hannah asks.

  “Yeah, I knew leadership wouldn’t want to stay in here and I also know if something really bad happened we would have the extra beds. Everything is wireless and hooked up to my phone so if something does happen I’ll get it immediately,” Doc says.

  “So, I can sleep in a normal bed then?” Hannah asks. Her eyes light up with hopeful excitement.

  “You sure can. We just need to figure out what room,” Doc says looking at me through his periphery. Asshole knows she isn’t going anywhere but mine. Hannah is mine.

  “Shithead. You know she’s going to mine. Let me know what I need to do to move her.”

  “Let me disconnect her from the wires and monitoring equipment and we will need to carry her over. I don’t want her bearing weight on the leg because of the sutures. I don’t want them popping. Let’s get Jimmy in here to help.”

  I can carry her just fine. He’s trying to get a rise out of me. He knows I’m possessive.

  “We don’t need Jimmy. I’m standing here to help. I’ll carry her,” I say.

  “Oh, you don’t need to do that. I’m kind of heavy,” Hannah says.

  “Are you saying Jimmy is stronger than me?” I ask. I’m definitely bigger and stronger than Jimmy. I’m offended.

  “No, it’s just I’m sure you have better things to do than play transport for me,” Hannah says biting her lip. Her beautiful face is swollen and one of her eyes is almost shut. She has bruises covering half of her face yet she’s as beautiful as ever.

  Doc moves and removes the wires. “Alright, she’s good to go. I’ll follow you,” Doc says.

  “You ready baby?” I ask.

  “Ready as I will ever be. Sorry you have to carry me,” Hannah says as she wraps her arms around my neck and I bridal style carry her to my bedroom. She winces in pain as I put my hand under her injured leg.

  “You okay? You let me know if you need me to stop,” I say looking down. She’s resting her head against my chest. Right over my heart.

  She whispers, “You’re heartbeat is so steady.”

  We reach my bedroom and lay her on my bed. “You comfortable?” I ask.

  “I really need one of these mattresses. This is so much better,” Hannah says. At that moment, her stomach starts to growl.

  “Food.” I say.

  “Huh?” She replies as Docs opens up the picture frame behind my bed and gets the monitor hooked up.

  “What do you want to eat? What can she eat, Doc?”

  “She can have whatever she wants. I’d suggest something with a lot of protein to help heal your tissue. I’ll be by tomorrow morning to check on you again and to give you Zinc and a multivitamin. I want to help your tissue in any way I can. I’ll also be monitoring you over night. If you need anything just let me know. I’m sure Hawk won’t be leaving your side,” he says with a smirk as he leaves. Asshole knows he’s teasing me.

  “Thank you, Doc,” Hannah yells out as he leaves.

  “So, what do you feel like eating?” I ask again.

  “You pick. You have to eat too. I could eat anything,” she says slowly closing her eyes. I let her sleep and order some food. It’s going to take about 45 minutes for it to be ready and for the prospect to grab the food. I ordered us a couple ribeye steaks, baked potatoes and a nice coleslaw from this steakhouse the next town over. I walk into my kitchen and grab myself a drink and finally relax on the sofa across from her. I can’t help but watch her. I feel like I can finally breathe a little better. I still have some guys trailing Hannah’s ex. They tracked him down to another state and will grab him and the club whore traitor.

  “Hawk,” Hannah says in a whisper. I get up and walk over to her.

  “Yeah hun?” I say as I move her hair away from her forehead.

  “Can you lay next to me? I sleep better that way,” she groans out.

  “Of course but only for a little okay? I have food on the way.”

  I lay in bed next to her and feel her place a hand over my heart. I feel at home like this. I’ve never felt something like this with a woman. She’s the first. I don’t feel tired but I feel myself drifting to sleep with her in my arms.

  My phone buzzes waking me up. I look and see it’s one of the prospects.

  “Hawk here,” I say groggily.

  “Pres, your food arrived. Do you want me to bring it in?” Jimmy says. I know he’s itching to see Hannah.

  “That’s fine prospect. Be silent though. Hannah’s sleeping,” I say. She’s still passed out laying on my chest. She hasn’t stirred at all.

  I slowly slide myself out from under her hold. I don’t want to wake her just yet. I receive a follow-up text from Jimmy saying he’s on the other side of the door. I walk over and open it and he’s standing there with bags of food.

  “Prospect,” I say grabbing the food.

 
“How is she, Pres?” he asks.

  “She’s sleeping. She’ll be okay,” I answer.

  “What about her fucking ex?” he replies angrily.

  “It’s being taken care of,” I reply.

  “Good,” he says. “Anything else I can get you two?” he asks trying to peak behind me.

  “That will be all, prospect. Take a night off. You did well,” I reply.

  “Thanks Pres,” he says walking out.

  I shut the door behind us and set the food up at the table. I’m trying to not make much noise but these plastic bags are noisy as hell. I walk over to the bed and caress her face.

  “Hannah, baby,” I say. She starts stirring and moaning a little. “Hannah, can you open those beautiful eyes for me?” She opens her eyes and looks at me. She gives me the biggest smile or an attempt at one. Her bottom lip is split open so it doesn’t go far.

  “Hi,” she says.

  “Hi there. It’s time to eat?”

  “Yay, I’m starving. Something smells good,” she says leaning up. She peeks behind me at the table. “Whatcha got there?”

  “Food. Delicious grub. High protein grub, doctors order,” I say. “When you’re ready, I’ll help you over.”

  “I think, I need to use the bathroom actually,” she says, embarrassed.

  “Alright, well let’s get you over,” I say.

  “Ugh, do you think maybe my cousin could help?”

  “Baby, I’m not going to look, as much as I want to. I’m just going to help you over to the toilet and you can do your business. When you’re done, I’ll getcha over to the table and we can have some chow,” I say.

  She spends sometime thinking about it. “Mmmm, okay,” she replies. I help her over to the side of the bed but we run into a problem. “What are we going to do about all these monitors and stuff?”

  “I’m already on it. Doc is heading over now,” I say as I text Doc.

  “Oh, thank goodness. I don’t know how much longer I can hold my pee,” she says holding her hands between her legs.

  There’s a knock at the door. “Pres, it’s me,” it’s Doc.

  “Come in Doc,” Hannah replies quickly.

  He walks in and starts unplugging her. “Now, Hannah, I want you to be careful when you use the bathroom. I don’t want you to rip a stitch. No weight on your leg. You let us help you okay?”

  “Got it. Can we hurry? I might pee on your comfortable bed and I’d be pissed at myself if I did that but we need to move.” She flails her hands in the air.

  “Yup. Let’s do this.” I go over to her and pick her up bridal style and carry her to the bathroom. I set her down on the toilet and let her do her thing. I stand on the other side of the door waiting.

  “Let me know if you need something,” I shout.

  “I will. Let me pee, man,” she replies in frustration.

  “Give her some time in their Hawk. She has a lot of injury to her vaginal area. This is going to be painful. She has multiple tears and cuts inside her,” Doc says.

  Shit. I didn’t even think about that. The fucker ripped her insides. I wish I could kill him again. He can’t hurt anyone anymore especially Hannah.

  “I’m done,” Hannah shouts.

  “Was everything okay?” Doc asks her as he pushes the door open.

  “Yeah, there was a little blood and it stung but nothing I haven’t felt before,” she replies. “Do you think we can get me off the toilet?” Her good leg is shaking.

  “Of course. Let’s get you up,” I say walking over to the toilet and lifting her. She isn’t wearing any pants only my shirt. We needed something loose and something that we could easily access her injuries with. I exit the bathroom and head to the table. I set Hannah down on a chair and prop her leg up with a pillow on another chair.

  “Thanks Hawk,” she says, holding my hand briefly.

  “Anything, just ask,” I reply.

  “Alright guys, I’m going to head back to my room. Let me know if you need anything. I think we can forgo the monitoring for now,” he replies as he leaves my room.

  “Thank you, Doc,” Hannah shouts. She turns to me. “So, what do we got here? I smell meat,” she says.

  I open up the containers revealing a nice juicy steak, baked potatoes, and some coleslaw. They also gave us some dinner rolls covered in a garlicky butter. I hope she likes it. This is my favorite place to order from.

  “Oh gosh, you could make me orgasm from the smell. My mouth is watering,” she says as she digs in. I take a seat and start digging into my food as well. We spend the next 45 minutes eating and talking. Once we’re done, I move us to the bathroom where she brushes her teeth and then gets back into bed.

  We’re lying in bed together watching a movie. Hannah turns towards me.

  “Thank you,” she leans over and gives me a quick kiss on the lips.

  I’m thrown off. “That was nice,” I say.

  “Sorry,” Hannah shies away.

  “Baby, you never have to be sorry for doing that. I’d let you do anything you wanted. Everything at your pace. I’m a patient man for you,” I reply.

  “Hawk, why are you so nice to me?” She asks curiously.

  “Because I want you, Hannah. Can’t you see that? You think I’d shoot a fucker straight in the head for just any woman. I’m drawn to you, I care for you and I want you.”

  “But you can have any woman you want. Someone who doesn’t look like me or have my issues.”

  “I don’t want any woman, I want you, woman. If you will have me, I will do everything I can to make you feel safe and continue to protect you and care for you,” I reply. I’ve never said something like that to a woman before but she makes me feel things I’ve never felt before and I barely know her.

  “Hawk, we barely know each other.”

  “So, we get to know each other. Everything I know about you makes me want to know more. I want to be that guy for you. I hate when you turn to Jimmy, I want you to come to me,” I say.

  “You’re jealous of Jimmy,” she says.

  “Maybe I am.” I reply.

  “You shouldn’t be. We could never be together again. He and I are different people now. I won’t say he’s like a brother because what we used to do together wasn’t brotherly. That’s for sure.”

  I don’t like hearing that. I guttural growl escapes from me.

  “What was that?” Hannah asks.

  “Nothing. I don’t like thinking about you and Jimmy fucking,” I reply with a snark.

  “Hey, that was in the past. I’m sure you’ve fucked your fair share of women.” She’s right.

  Hannah and I spend the night together. It’s very difficult sleeping next to a woman and not fucking her. Especially one that I want so bad. I know she isn’t ready and I would never pressure her into anything. If anything, I’m going to let her pursue me sexually. I have to work at her pace until she feels safe and comfortable even if I’m uncomfortable…physically.

  Chapter 16

  Hannah

  6 months later…

  I can’t believe it’s already been six months since I became officially free from my ex. After Hawk and his club caught up to him, they told me I didn’t have to worry about him anymore. I didn’t ask any questions but I’m almost certain he’s no longer amongst the living. I was able to go back to the home we shared and get all my belongings and moved back in with my cousin for a while. We’ve been living together while I got back on my feet. In fact, today is my moving day. I start vlogging and making my cooking videos again and people love it. My cookbooks also have spiked in sales. I’ve been saving all my money and I found a home of my own not too far from Jen’s. She needs her space these days, her and one of the new prospects have been together, loudly. Sleeping in the same house with two people in a honeymoon phase is torture.

  I’ve healed physically and my hair has grown as well. Betty has been taming my hair while it grows. We actually put in extension
s today and I’m excited to have long hair again. I decided on chocolate brown with light streaks of a honey blonde running through. Mentally and emotionally, I’ve been seeing a therapist who has helped me realize that everything that happened wasn’t my fault and that I deserve happiness and to have someone who loves and cares for me. I’m finally ready for that. I’m completely healed but I feel a new normal.

  My new house is a fixer upper, I got her super cheap. She sits on an acre of land and it’s quiet and quaint. I love it. It’s not crazy far from Jen’s either. It definitely needs some work, the kitchen is especially a mess. I need to save up some more money to make it more livable but for now the outdated furnishings and appliances will do. Jen lets me use her kitchen and place to film.

  I take a look at my new cell phone and notice that Jimmy is late. Jimmy was supposed to bring his truck by to help me move. I pull my cell phone from my back pocket and call him. He has never been late.

  “Hello?” the line picks up.

  “Jimmy,” I say.

  “No, this is Hawk. Hannah?” Hawk is answering Jimmy’s phone.

  “Hawk, why are you answering Jimmy’s phone?”

  “Because I pay for this phone and I can answer if I chose to,” he replies. Jeez, so snarky.

  “Can I talk to Jimmy please?”

  “Jimmy, is actually being seen by doc. We think he broke his collar bone.”

  “Shit. How did that happen? Will he be okay?” I hope he’s okay. Breaking your collar bone isn’t fun. I’ve done that a few times.

  “He’ll be fine. He was wrestling with a couple of the guys and things got rough. They took it too far playing around,” he replies.

  “Shit. Is there any way I can talk to him? Please Hawk. It’s important.” I ask. I was counting on him helping me move my stuff to my new place. He was also going to take me shopping for a new mattress and furniture for my bedroom. I also need to meet the realtor at my house in 30 minutes and Jen went out of town with the Prospect.

  “Who is it?” I hear Jimmy say. “Hannah?”

  “Jimmy, are you okay?”