Resisting Love

by Kat Bellemore

  Caleb didn’t push the issue as he rang up her purchase at the cash register, but even after she’d paid for the wetsuit, he didn’t hand her the bag right away. “It was probably a shock, seeing you after so long. For Isaac, I mean.”

  Had it been? It was hard to tell, considering he’d acted more indifferent than surprised. With a touch of anger. Leanne dropped her gaze to the bag, not trusting herself to meet Caleb’s gaze. “Uh-huh.”

  “It was tough for him, after you left,” Caleb continued, still not releasing the bag.

  Leanne finally relented and looked up. And when she did, she saw nothing but kindness in Caleb’s eyes. And understanding. Somehow, he knew. And that was when the dam burst and the tears flowed. She didn’t say anything, didn’t need to. Just cried.

  Caleb handed her a tissue, and she blew her nose in the most unattractive way possible. Loud and snotty. He handed her another tissue. “Isaac just needs some time,” Caleb said. “He didn’t expect you to ever come back, and he’d figured out his own way of dealing with that. But with your reappearance… He’ll get used to the idea.”

  Leanne held out her hand for another tissue. “I don’t want him to have to get used to the idea of me. It’s like the fifteen years we were together don’t even count for anything.”

  “They do,” said Caleb, his words slow. “But so do the past two years.”

  Leanne knew he was right, but that didn’t stop the tears from starting all over again.

  “I’ll tell you what,” he said. “Why don’t you come over for dinner tomorrow night? You can meet Bree. I know you’ll like her.”

  Leanne nodded, sucking in a breath, trying to calm her nerves. “Dinner sounds nice.”

  “Six-thirty?”

  “Six-thirty.”

  Caleb finally gave her the bag, and Leanne hugged it to her chest, like that wetsuit was going to make everything okay again. Maybe it was. Surfing had always had a way of making big problems seem conquerable.

  But she’d never gone out there with a problem that seemed bigger than the waves—so big that it dwarfed them.

  Leanne was going to have her work cut out for her.

  6

  Leanne straightened her blouse and shifted awkwardly as she waited for Caleb to open the back door to his dive shop. The only way to get to his apartment was to take a path overgrown with vines that wound behind the boardwalk. Thank goodness she had traded in her high heels for flip-flops. As she waited, she began to wonder if the doorbell worked. Leanne pressed the button again but didn’t hear any ringing inside.

  After another moment, she pulled out her phone to check the text that Caleb had sent her. Maybe she had the wrong day. Or time. She was just digging through her purse, knowing her phone had to be in there somewhere, when footsteps approached from her right. She shifted against the building so that whoever it was could slip past her, but the footsteps slowed to a stop. Leanne glanced up.

  Isaac.

  She suddenly forgot what she had been looking for, or why she was on that overgrown pathway in the first place. All she knew was that she’d rather be anywhere than there. “I…was just leaving,” she said. When it came to fight or flight mode, she was a runner.

  Leanne stepped away from the building, ready to put as much distance between herself and Isaac as possible. Just seeing him, remembering his cold welcome on the beach a few days earlier, was too much.

  Fortunately, the door to Caleb’s shop swung open at that moment. Caleb stood there, beaming, and gestured for her to come in. “Right on time. Sorry, I heard the bell, but the timer on the oven went off at the same time, and I had to save the chicken cacciatore.”

  Leanne had never felt so relieved. “Sounds fancy,” she said, stepping past Caleb. She walked up the steep stairs that led to his apartment.

  She had only been up there on a couple of occasions—several years back when she and Isaac had been dating—but thankfully it no longer resembled the bachelor pad it had once been. Not that Caleb had ever gone crazy with neon signs or anything like that, but it definitely had a woman’s touch now. Curtains were draped across the previously bare windows, and beautiful photographs adorned the walls. Some were of Caleb and his wife, Bree, and others were of sea animals or other aspects of their oceanside community. A small table was set against the wall, four chairs squished around it. An open kitchen sat to the left, and then a hallway led to where the bedroom and bathroom probably were.

  Even though Leanne had never met Bree before—Caleb’s wife hadn’t grown up in Starlight Ridge—as soon as Bree rounded the corner at the end of the hallway, Bree’s expression lit up.

  “I’m so happy to finally meet you.” Bree beamed, rushing forward. She paused. “Is it okay if I hug you? I never used to be a hugger, but moving to this town seems to have brought it out of me.”

  Leanne laughed. “It does seem to have that effect on people.” She stepped forward and gave Bree a quick hug. Leanne could understand why Caleb had fallen for her. Bree was beautiful, but in a down-to-earth kind of way. She wore a loose top with capris, and her eyes were warm, and her smile contagious. “It smells delicious in here,” Leanne said. Her gaze landed on the table, and she noticed that not only were there four chairs around the table, but there were also four place settings. “Is someone else eating with us?” Caleb hadn’t mentioned anyone else when he’d invited her to dinner. He’d told her it was to welcome her home and give her a chance to meet Bree. From what Leanne’s mother had told her, they’d been married only a few months.

  A guilty expression passed across Bree’s face. “I told Caleb he should ask you first and make sure it would be all right.”

  Speaking of Caleb, where was he?

  Leanne walked to the window and looked out. Isaac was still there, as was Caleb. And they were arguing. She had never known those two to raise their voices to each other, let alone argue. “You invited Isaac to dinner.”

  Bree didn’t even try to hide the truth of the statement. “Yes.”

  Leanne didn’t turn from the window—didn’t want Bree to see the moisture in her eyes. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

  “Caleb thought…I don’t know…maybe it would reduce some of the… Of course, maybe there isn’t any….”

  Bree was still struggling to form her thoughts into words when Leanne cut her off, though Leanne’s voice remained soft. “Did you know that I hadn’t even been inside my house before I went out to the beach to find him?” She glanced at Bree over her shoulder. “Or that he couldn’t even look at me?” Leanne could tell by Bree’s stunned expression that she hadn’t known.

  “I’m sorry…” Bree’s voice trailed off.

  Leanne tried to hide the tears that now tracked down her cheeks. They were more out of humiliation than anything. Isaac had turned her away, treating her as if she were a stranger. No, he had treated her as less than a stranger. He wouldn’t have ignored any of the tourists like that. Leanne had deluded herself into thinking that her coming back home would make up for years of mistakes. That was the moment she’d decided that she wouldn’t try again—this was her punishment for staying away like she had. For chasing an impossible dream.

  And to be confronted with Isaac’s presence so soon—it was like punishment wasn’t enough. Instead, her fate was to be tormented.

  “I need to go,” Leanne said abruptly. “I know you didn’t mean anything by it, and I’m sure the food you’ve made is amazing, but…I can’t do this right now.” She meant to move from the window, but she couldn’t seem to tear her gaze from the two men below.

  Isaac turned and looked up. She didn’t step back in time, and his gaze met hers. Leanne didn’t know what he saw in her eyes, but she swore she saw deep anguish in his. Like he was being tormented in his own kind of way.

  “Can I go out the front of the store?” she asked, turning.

  Bree hesitated. Leanne could practically see the wheels spinning in her head. This was obviously not how Bree had imagined the dinner going. But she cou
ldn’t seem to come up with a reason Leanne shouldn’t leave, and she released a long sigh and lifted one shoulder. “Of course. Let me grab the shop keys.”

  Great, now Leanne felt like a jerk. It didn’t seem like Caleb was going to be able to drag Isaac up those stairs anyway, so she might as well stay and enjoy a good dinner. “Actually, how about if I stay,” she said. Bree was already across the room, her hand resting on a set of keys that hung from a crooked hook in the wall. “Dinner smells delicious, and I’d love to get to know you.”

  Bree’s hand fell back to her side, empty, as she slowly turned to face Leanne. “Really?” Her voice had a hopeful lilt to it, but her expression was also guarded. She had definitely gotten more than she’d bargained for.

  “Yeah. I mean, if Caleb chose you out of all the Starlight Ridge hopefuls, you must be pretty great.” Leanne shot a wide grin in Bree’s direction to prove that she meant it.

  With a smile of her own, Bree visibly relaxed and gestured to the couch that sat near Leanne. “We can sit while we wait for the men to…figure things out.” That was a nice way of putting it. And Leanne was counting on only one of the men returning.

  Fingers crossed.

  Leanne plopped down at one end of the couch and immediately sank deep into the cushion, giving her the feeling that she was inside a couch cocoon. If she were any shorter, she’d have a problem, considering her feet now barely touched the floor. She squirmed for a moment, trying to get more comfortable, but eventually gave up and instead picked up a square pillow next to her. She fiddled with one of the tassels that hung from the corners. “So…” She shifted as Bree sat on the opposite side of the couch. Yeah, getting out of this thing was going to be next to impossible. She’d bet that Caleb had inherited it from his dad when he’d taken over the dive shop. “What brought you to Starlight Ridge?”

  Truthfully, Leanne already knew the story. Even though she had been living several hours away, her mom had called her every Sunday evening and made sure she caught Leanne up on everything going on in Starlight Ridge. From what Leanne had gathered, Bree had come to visit Adeline, the local chocolate shop owner and Bree’s college roommate, for a couple of weeks. She’d met Caleb while in town, and bada bing bada boom, they fell in love and got married.

  So when Bree said, “I had left my fiancé and needed to get out of New Mexico for a while,” Leanne was suddenly very interested in what Bree had to say, and actually managed to forget about Isaac for a moment.

  Leanne leaned forward the best she could. “I’m sorry. You what?”

  Bree gave an easy laugh, like she was used to that reaction. “It’s not as bad as it sounds.”

  “I hope it is,” Leanne said. “All the good stories are.”

  That pulled another laugh from Bree. “Okay, it kind of is. Because I never actually loved my fiancé, and vice versa. He was the son of my dad’s business partner—”

  Bree cut off mid-sentence when the apartment door swung open, and they both turned to see Caleb walking in.

  Leanne tried to hide her disappointment, doubtful that Bree would continue the story of her ex-fiancé now that Caleb was there. She made a mental note to pay his wife another visit to get the rest of that story. She didn’t think anyone in Starlight Ridge knew the real reason that Bree had come to town or she would have heard it by then.

  “Ready to eat?” Caleb asked. He turned and held the door open. For Isaac. Even after Caleb had shut the door behind him, though, Isaac didn’t venture further into the room.

  How Caleb had convinced Isaac to stay for dinner, Leanne had no idea. But this couldn’t lead to anything good. Leanne knew she couldn’t leave now without being completely rude, but if she told them she couldn’t stay because she didn’t feel well, it wouldn’t be a lie. Her pulse had skyrocketed, leaving her lightheaded and her stomach queasy. At least if she passed out, it would be genuine.

  Bree gave her husband a strained smile before standing and saying, “I’ll get the food ready. Want to help me?”

  “I can help,” Leanne said, attempting to follow her but struggling to get out of the butt print she’d created in the couch cushion. They seriously needed new furniture. How had Bree done it? She’d made it look so easy.

  “We got this covered,” Caleb said, waving Leanne off. “You just relax, and we’ll have it out in a moment.”

  Seriously? After everything that had just happened, they were going to leave her with Isaac?

  Yup. They totally were.

  At least it was an open kitchen design, so they weren’t completely alone, though with the tension that had just settled over them, they might as well have been.

  Isaac still hadn’t moved and looked like a sentry at his post, protecting that front door.

  From where she sat, Leanne could see Caleb and Bree, taking their sweet time as they moved around the kitchen while talking in hushed tones. Her gaze scanned the room, but it kept coming back to Isaac. She felt bad seeing him standing there, his gaze on the floor. He apparently hadn’t been tempted to look her way—unlike her, who couldn’t stop. She blew out a frustrated breath. This was ridiculous. They were two adults. Mostly. They could do this. “I promise I won’t attack if you sit down,” she finally said.

  Isaac didn’t acknowledge her words.

  She tried again. “What are you going to do, have them serve you over there at the door?”

  He didn’t respond to that either. Just shifted his weight a little, like his feet were starting to tire.

  “Would it help if I stood on the other side of the room?” Leanne didn’t wait for a response this time. She rocked herself, trying to get out of the couch so she could give Isaac more breathing room. Not like there were very many places she could go, considering the size of the apartment. Her attempts failed, however, and she frowned. A quick glance told her that Isaac’s resolve had weakened, and he was finally watching her instead of the floor. His lips were still pressed into a serious line, but his eyes crinkled in amusement.

  “You could help me, you know,” she said.

  Isaac didn’t move. Leanne hadn’t expected him to, knowing it had been too much to hope for. But then he surprised her by stepping forward, though hesitantly. When he reached her, he paused. But, rather than hold out his hand to help her up like a normal person would do, he grabbed her by the arm and pulled her up so quickly, she flew to her feet. She’d forgotten how strong he was.

  He quickly let go, like she had burned him, and then retreated toward the window. At least he was finally away from the door.

  Leanne rubbed her arm where he’d held her, confused by the interaction.

  “Did I hurt you?” Isaac asked, misinterpreting the gesture. His brows were furrowed in concern.

  “No,” she said, dropping her arms to her sides. And that was the truth. It hadn’t physically hurt. It had twisted her emotions into a pretzel, though, making her realize that this was not the same man she’d left two years ago. Then again, she wasn’t the same woman. And that touch had said it all. It had felt so unfamiliar—nothing like when Isaac used to caress her arms, his fingers gentle and his gaze longing.

  The way he was looking at her now—it was as if they’d never met.

  “We have dinner,” Caleb sang out, walking from the kitchen and over to the table, a filled plate in each hand.

  Leanne couldn’t tell if he’d been watching them, waiting for the appropriate time to reemerge, but she was grateful for the distraction. “It looks amazing.”

  He set the plates down just as Bree walked over with the other two plates. Each held chicken cacciatore, French bread, and salad.

  “Don’t worry,” Bree said. “We have dessert. It just wouldn’t all fit on the same plate.”

  Leanne smiled, forcing her gaze to remain on Bree and not travel to where Isaac leaned against the wall on the opposite side of the table. “Even if you didn’t, that would be all right by me. This is already more than I expected. Caleb’s lucky to have married someone who can cook so well.�
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  “Hey,” Caleb protested, giving her a wounded look. “I made dinner.”

  Oops.

  “That’s what I meant,” Leanne said, offering him an apologetic smile. “Caleb’s lucky he married someone who would appreciate his cooking.”

  He folded his arms. “Now it sounds like I’m so terrible at it that I was hard-pressed to find someone who would eat it.”

  There was no winning this one.

  Leanne speared a bite of chicken onto her fork and shoved it into her mouth. She smiled as she chewed. “Yum-my.”

  “That’s more like it,” Caleb said with a nod, though she could tell he was trying not to laugh. He threw a side glance at Isaac as he cut his own chicken. “It’s easier to eat when you’re sitting down.”

  Isaac didn’t move right away, his gaze landing on Leanne for a brief moment. Then he lifted one shoulder, like he didn’t care either way, and slid into a chair.

  Leanne grabbed her French bread and ripped off a bite, unwilling to show how hurt she was by his indifference. Yeah, things were weird. And she knew it was all her fault. But she wanted to make it right, and Isaac wasn’t even giving her a chance.

  Maybe she shouldn’t have returned to Starlight Ridge after all.

  Not if it was going to be like this.

  7

  Isaac finished his dinner in record time. “Thank you for everything,” he told Caleb as he stood to leave.

  Caleb’s gaze landed on Leanne, who wasn’t even halfway done with her plate. “Of course. We love having you over,” he said, his attention returning to Isaac. “Which means you can’t leave before dessert. We made your favorite.”

  Leanne perked up at that. “You made a lava cake?”

  Isaac’s eyes snapped in her direction. “You remembered,” he said, surprised. She looked equally surprised that he’d actually spoken to her.

  Shoot. He hadn’t meant to. It wasn’t that he didn’t want to talk to Leanne, but it made staying away that much more difficult. And that was what he’d need to do to retain his sanity. What if he let her in, and then she left again? She’d already done it once when a better opportunity presented itself. It had taken the entire two years to finally start functioning again. He was pretty sure another heartbreak would finish him off.