Spider

by SJ McCoy

  Jane smiled when the man standing beside her turned around and touched the brim of his hat at Frankie with a laugh. “I’m the sick animal who needed her all afternoon. The least I could do is load her up with all the bread and pastries she needs for the weekend in return.”

  “Shane! How the hell are you? And what’s going on with you? I haven’t seen you in weeks.”

  Shane grinned. “I’ve been busy. Between the guests and the horses at the ranch, and my good lady wife at home. I never get to come up for air anymore.”

  Frankie had to laugh when his wife, Cassidy, appeared at his side and winked at her. “What’s that, cowboy? Are you bitching that I take up too much of your time? Because you know I can always entertain myself.”

  Shane wrapped his arms around her and dipped her low over his knee as he kissed her. They were both laughing when he set her back on her feet. “No, dear. Never, dear. I said you keep me busy.” He waggled his eyebrows. “I never said I don’t love every minute of it.”

  “Asshole!” Cassidy slapped his arm with a grin.

  Frankie loved them. She’d known Shane her whole life. He’d always been full of himself, and with good reason. He was a good-looking, lovable guy. Not that she’d ever been interested. He, and all his brothers for that matter, were like more cousins to her. But she’d been alone in her lack of interest. Girls, and later women, had always fallen over themselves to be around him – to get into his bed, and for most of his life he’d been more than happy to accommodate them. Until Cassidy came along.

  She turned to Frankie now. “I haven’t seen you in ages, girlfriend. Gina said she ran into you. Oh, that’s right. You were with Grace’s friend, Spider.” She waggled her eyebrows. “How’s that going? I have to tell you, I met him once when I went to LA with Hope. Damn, girl! That man is hot!”

  Shane smiled through pursed lips. “Err, excuse me? Husband. Sitting right here. Remember?”

  Cassidy laughed. “As if I could ever forget. But you’re the one who always tells me how robust your ego is. You can take it, can’t you?”

  Shane winked at Frankie and Jane. “I can take it, all right.” He looked around the crowded bakery. “And I know that you feel the same way, dear.” He grinned when he spotted someone. “So, I’m sure you won’t mind if I just go and have a quick chat with Leena.”

  He took a step away from them, but Cassidy tapped him lightly on the shoulder.

  “Yes, dear?”

  “You go over there and talk to her, and you’ll find your dinner in the dog and me on my way to a wine bar in Bozeman.”

  Shane laughed out loud. “We don’t have a dog.”

  Cassidy chuckled. “Nope. But I do have a wine bar in Bozeman in mind.”

  Shane turned back to Jane. “I think that means that I need to take my wife home. I covered your tab, sweetheart. Anything else your little heart desires, you get it and put on mine, okay. I can’t thank you enough for today. Thanks again.”

  “You’re welcome. It’s what I do. And you know I love helping you guys out.”

  Cassidy hugged her and then grinned at Frankie. “I’ll call you both when the girls are getting together again. You should come. But for now, I’m going to drag this reprobate home.” She took hold of Shane’s collar and pretended to drag him toward the door.

  “If you’re mean to me, I might just go and say hi to her.”

  Cassidy glowered at him and let go of his collar. “It’s your call, cowboy. You do that if you want to. I haven’t been over to Bozeman in a while.”

  Frankie shook her head as she watched them walk away.

  Jane laughed beside her, and then let out a big sigh.

  “You okay?”

  “Yeah. I’m good. I just love those two.”

  “Me, too, both as individuals and as a couple.”

  “Yeah.” Jane got a dreamy look on her face. “They’re both larger than life and full of fun.”

  “And unashamedly, totally in love,” said Frankie.

  “That’s a weird way to put it. You think that being in love is something they should be ashamed of?”

  “No. I don’t even know why I said it that way. I just meant that it’s obvious and they don’t care who knows it.”

  Jane raised an eyebrow at her.

  “What?”

  “Why would it matter who knows it – or what they think?”

  “I don’t know. I don’t – ” She stopped short when she saw the look on Jane’s face. “Oh, no. No way. Don’t look at me like that.”

  “Like what?”

  “Like you’re thinking about me. You’re the one who’d love to fall in love.”

  Jane shrugged. “Yes. But since there’s about a zero percent chance of that happening, I live vicariously through you.”

  “There’s a hundred percent chance of you finding love if you decide that you want it.” Frankie wanted to add, and if you believe that you deserve it, but she knew that Jane would only turn that around and make it about her looks. It wasn’t what Frankie meant and she didn’t want to go there. They’d had that argument more times than she cared to count.

  She was relieved when Jane shrugged. “We’re not talking about me this time. We’re talking about you. You’re not ashamed to admit that you’re in love, are you?”

  “No! I – ” The words wouldn’t come. She wanted to declare, as she always had, that she wasn’t interested in love. That it was a trap and a fool’s game. But she couldn’t make the words come out.

  The teasing look in Jane’s eyes turned serious. “Wow! I was kind of hoping but I didn’t know for sure. You’re in love with him?”

  Frankie swallowed then looked all around her, making sure no one would hear. Her heart hammered in her chest. She should deny it. At least take the time to figure out if it were true. But the rapid, steady beat of her heart didn’t need time or confirmation. It sent the undeniable truth humming through her veins. She’d gone and fallen in love with Spider.

  Chapter Eighteen

  Frankie almost crushed Spider’s fingers as the plane descended toward the runway. She’d gotten quieter during the flight, and he wasn’t sure if she was scared of flying or nervous about her first visit to LA. He doubted the others had noticed. But he had, and he didn’t know which was worse. He wanted her to be excited to visit his world, but he didn’t want to scare the life out of her to get her there. He smiled to hide a grimace as she crushed his hand even tighter when the wheels touched down.

  “Are you sure you don’t want us to give you a ride?” asked Tara.

  “No, thanks. We’re good. It makes more sense for us to have a rental for the weekend.”

  The door from the cockpit opened and Woody, the pilot came out, and they all got to their feet. “Here you go, folks. The golf cart should be out to collect you by the time I get the steps down.” He turned to Spider. “And I checked with the girls on the desk. Your rental is waiting for you, you’ll just need to stop and see them to do the paperwork.”

  “Thanks, man.”

  Woody grinned at him. “My pleasure.” He nodded at Frankie. “I hope you enjoy your visit.”

  “Thanks, I will.” Spider loved that she stood a little closer to him as she spoke. Woody was a good-looking guy, and his escapades with the ladies were well known. He wasn’t flirting with Frankie, and Spider knew that he wouldn’t. But it still felt good that Frankie was making it clear that they were together. Though he wasn’t sure whether it was to reassure him or herself. She’d been excited at the prospect of coming to the city for the weekend. She told him that she’d never been before. She’d been her usual chatty self at first on the plane, talking with Tara and playing with Owen. She got along well with Reid, which had surprised Spider at first, but it shouldn’t. She was smart in so many ways. Reid enjoyed the company of anyone with a quick mind, he didn’t need them to be academic or intellectual. But as the plane had descended toward Santa Monica Regional Airport, she’d grown quiet – and his aching fingers were proof that s
he was nervous. He was looking forward to getting her in the car and to himself again so that he could make sure she was okay.

  Once Woody let the steps down, Tara went out first, followed by Owen and then Reid. Woody touched Spider’s arm. “Do you mind if I get them and their bags off on the first golf cart? Tara’s sister’s waiting for them. She wanted to surprise them.”

  “Sure. Get them sorted first. We can wait, can’t we?”

  Frankie smiled up at him as he wrapped his arm around her shoulders. “Of course. I’m happy to wait here.”

  “Thanks.” Woody grinned at them and then followed them down the steps. After he’d taken care of Tara, Owen, and Reid, and sent them and their bags on their way to the FBO building, he rode with Spider and Frankie on the second golf cart.

  “Do you guys have any big plans for the weekend?”

  Spider smiled. “I have to check in on the coffee shop and visit the center, but other than that, my plan is to show my girl around the city.”

  “This your first visit?”

  “Yeah.” She seemed nervous again now. It only made Spider more determined to make sure that she had a good time. He could relate. He’d felt out of place in her world to start with and she’d done everything she could to make him feel at home. He tightened his arm around her shoulders. He loved that she was so confident and outgoing usually. He’d never been attracted to helpless women. But sensing a certain vulnerability about her now that she was out of her element only made him love her more.

  Shit. There he went with the L word again. If he was going to keep thinking about it, he really should tell her. But he didn’t want to tell her because he didn’t want to give her reason to run.

  Woody grinned at him. “Are you going to give her the whole tourist experience?”

  “We’re going to play it by ear.”

  “Make him show you the sights,” he told Frankie. “You should do Griffith Park. You have to do Universal Studios and …” Woody burst out laughing.

  “What?” Spider gave him a puzzled look.

  “Sorry. I crack myself up sometimes.” Woody winked at Frankie. “You have to go to Hollywood – so that you can say Frankie went to Hollywood.”

  She rolled her eyes and groaned. “Thanks, but I think we can give that a miss.”

  The golf cart stopped outside the doors and Woody went to get their bags from the back, but Spider took them from him. “Thanks, man. I’ve got ‘em. It’s only me, you don’t need to …”

  Woody gave him a dark look. “I do need to. You fly with me, you get the whole experience. I’m not going to treat you any different.”

  Spider had to laugh when Frankie came and took her bag from them. “Thanks, guys, but I’ve got it.”

  Woody laughed with him. “Okay, you win, lady. I hope you guys have a great weekend. I’ll see you back here on Sunday afternoon.”

  It took less than ten minutes to deal with the paperwork, and then they were in the rental car and pulling away from the airport.

  Spider reached for Frankie’s hand as he drove. “Are you okay?”

  “I’m good.” She was looking all around her. “It’s pretty. The palm trees and everything.”

  “It is, but it’s nothing like Montana.”

  She laughed. “Nowhere on Earth is anything like Montana. I did some research online before we came. Did you know that there are four million people who live in Los Angeles?”

  “I didn’t.”

  “Well, there are. And it’s less than five hundred square miles. That’s eight and a half thousand people per square mile.” She shook her head. “I had to check. Montana is a hundred and forty-seven thousand square miles with a population of just over one million. That means there are seven people per square mile. Seven!” She turned and looked at him. “And half the time I feel like I need to get away from people there!”

  Spider’s smile disappeared, and he squeezed her hand. “Shit! I didn’t think. Was this a bad idea – you coming here?”

  “Hell, no!” She grinned at him. “I can do it. I mean, I couldn’t ever live here or anything but …”

  Spider glanced over at her. Her cheeks were flushed, and she turned to look out the window again.

  “But I’m glad I get to see it with you,” she added.

  “I am, too.” Spider’s mind was racing. He knew he should keep it in check. She was here to visit for the weekend. That was all. He shouldn’t feel disappointed that she couldn’t ever see herself living here. He couldn’t see her being happy in the city either. And the only reason he was even thinking about it was because he was thinking about her living with him. He needed to get a grip.

  What did he know about love anyway? That was what had him spinning in circles – the idea that he loved her, and that he wanted her to be part of his life. He shouldn’t be reading too much – or anything at all – into her declaration that she’d never be able to live here. She was just talking in general terms.

  When they reached his apartment building, she let him take her bag as they walked across the parking lot. He had to wonder what she’d make of his place. He was proud of it. But now, he was wondering if to her it would seem like just a box, stacked amongst hundreds of other boxes.

  She turned to him while they waited for the elevator. “Do you love your life here?”

  He held her gaze for a long moment. He had the crazy urge to say, not as much as I love you. But that would be so unfair. She didn’t need that kind of pressure. Instead, he shrugged.

  “I like it well enough. It’s the only life I’ve known until now. I didn’t have the best start, but I am kind of proud of what I’ve built. I know it’s nothing major, especially not next to Reid and his brothers but – ”

  “Hey!” She scowled at him. “You don’t get to compare yourself to them. You didn’t start in the same place they did. They’ve done well for themselves, but you’ve gone so much further from where you started to where you are now.”

  He gestured for her to step into the elevator when the doors opened and then followed her.

  She grinned and poked him in the chest. “It’s true. Don’t look like that.”

  “I guess.”

  She let out a low whistle when he let her into the apartment. “Damn! This place is something major, if you ask me.”

  He grinned. He couldn’t help it. He loved his apartment. It was his refuge. His sanctuary. After never having known what it was like to live in one place – to have a home, he’d put everything he had into making this place feel like one. “Thanks. I like it.”

  She went to stand in front of the windows that looked out on the city far below. “I love it! It’s amazing.” She turned back and looked around the inside. “It feels like you.”

  “Thanks.” That sent a rush of warmth through his chest. He didn’t know why but it felt good that she knew him well enough that she could see – feel – that his apartment was important to him. He went to join her by the windows. “Do you want the grand tour? It’ll only take two minutes.”

  She laughed. “I’d love it.”

  Most of the living space was visible from where they were standing. The kitchen was sleek and modern He’d renovated it himself a couple years back. The cabinets were black with white countertops, and the appliances were all stainless steel.

  Frankie grinned. “I like it. I always thought it was supposed to be white cabinets with black countertops, but I like it better your way.”

  Spider’s smile faded.

  “Shit. Sorry. Did I say something wrong?”

  “No.” He made himself smile again. He didn’t want to cast any shadows over their time together.

  “Tell me?” She put her hand on his arm. “I don’t know why, but something about me liking your kitchen upset you. Didn’t it?”

  He held her gaze for a long moment, and eventually she shrugged.

  “Sorry. I shouldn’t be so nosey, should I? Want to show me the rest?”

  He sucked in a deep breath and slowly let it
out. This felt like an important moment. If he refused to tell her, if he let her think that she was being nosey, he was making a decision about their relationship – he’d be deciding to keep her out, to keep her at a safe distance. And he didn’t want to do that.

  “White cabinets remind me of one of my placements – the one where the woman beat the shit of me because I left dirty fingerprints on one of those cabinets.”

  “Oh, Spider!” She flung herself at him and wrapped her arms around him. “I’m sorry.”

  “It’s okay. You didn’t know.”

  “I don’t mean I’m sorry I asked. I mean I’m sorry for everything that you had to live through. It sucks.”

  Her hand was gently stroking the back of his head and his neck.

  “It did suck. But it’s the past. I survived and I’m doing good these days.”

  “You’re doing so much better than just good.”

  He tightened his arms around her, holding her closer against him. He didn’t want to get stuck in the darkness that came with talking about his childhood. He had a much better idea. He kissed his way along her jaw, then nibbled his way down her neck. “I’m doing great.” He nipped at the soft skin on her shoulder. “And what I’d like to be doing right now is you.”

  She laughed, and tightened her arms around his neck, then jumped up to wrap her legs around his waist. “I thought you’d never ask. Take me, I’m yours!”

  “I wish you were.” The words came out before he could censor them. Shit. He closed his hands around her ass and carried her to the bedroom. When he tried to set her down on the bed, she kept hold of him, pulling him with her.

  “Do you?”

  He raised an eyebrow.

  “Wish I was yours?”

  He looked deep into her beautiful blue eyes. “I don’t want you to feel like I’m putting pressure on you. You’ve made it clear where you stand, and I’m good with that.”

  She frowned. “Where do I stand?”

  “Well, I guess that’s kind of the point. You don’t stand still for long. You’re with me for now, but you’ll move on.” He made himself smile and dropped a kiss on her lips. “So, forgive me if I try to make the most of every minute that I get with you?” He started to unbutton her shirt and followed his fingers with his lips until his mouth was between her breasts. She writhed beneath him when he got rid of her shirt and bra and teased one nipple with his tongue and teeth while his fingers took care of the other.