Trusting Again

by Lo'Ren A Mayler

  Of course, it was hard to pass someone that just didn’t care. Nikki didn’t believe in failing students for gym. It was supposed to help them be more active and possibly find an activity they could enjoy for the rest of their life. The idea of a student not getting into a good school because of gym was ridiculous. All Nikki asked of her pupils was that they showed up and tried. You don’t need to be a star athlete to get a good grade.

  Every new possession the students were supposed to rotate, but Michael never wanted to leave his corner. He just stood there hunched over and stared at the floor, occasionally glancing towards the ball so he didn’t get hit with it.

  “Come on Michael. Your serve.”

  It was a little frustrating, always having to be the bad guy. To make him participate. He knows what is expected of him. Why can’t he just do it for once? Michael took the ball, threw it into the air and hit it straight into the net. Effectively ending his turn to serve. Nikki would talk to him about the lack of effort but, she heard from other teachers, he did not care about any of his grades.

  Reed found herself wondering lately about the change in Michael. He wasn’t always like this. Nikki remembered when she had first met Michael, his freshman year. While he was never coordinated, largely due to his thin lanky frame, he always smiled and interacted with everyone. He was always happy and joking around. The kind of kid that could change the mood of the room just by entering it. Michael toted his back pack, filled to the brim, everywhere he went. There was never a time when he wasn’t studying. He loved to read and learn, probably why he was so overjoyed while he was at school.

  Michael was a junior now. He did not bring any books to his classes and only had one notepad that Nikki ever saw. The same green single subject that he would roll up and put in his back pocket. If he didn’t take notes or study, what did he write in the notebook? Nikki had dismissed the students to get dressed. She waited in the gym for them to return from the locker room. The students could roam the gym and socialize the last couple minutes, until the bell rang. Most students would change fairly quickly and talk with their friends or wait by the door to go see someone in the hall. Michael always sat alone on the bleachers and kept his head in the notepad. Nikki tried to say hi to him on multiple occasions, but he always grunted in response. Never tearing his eyes from his notebook. She didn’t know how to reach him. She had been debating asking for advice. Surely Mia would know what to do.

  She willed the day to fly by, but that would only work if she could get Mia off her mind. Fat chance. Instead every thought to pass through her mind led to Mia. She would start off thinking about softball and end up thinking about Mia sliding into third. Trying to focus on gym class only created images of Mia covered in sweat from a work out. She refused to consciously think about tonight, because if she let herself go there, if she allowed herself to be drawn in, she would get lost and stay there. The day passed so slowly, the hours ticking by like minutes, it felt as though a day was going to turn into a week. Would every day be like this? Counting the seconds until she could see Mia again. Was it just because of the newness of her feelings? If it never changed, weeks would become years. I hope not. While years with Mia sounded unexpectedly wonderful, she presumed that it was only the time apart that would feel long. When they were together it would fly by and she would be left wanting once again.

  Sam was never in the office before Nikki and today was no different. Reed walked in dreading the conversation to come. Dreading having to face perhaps an agitated Sam. Nikki was sitting in her office running scenarios in her head when the text arrived. She didn’t usually answer her phone during practice, but she had been doing a many things out of the norm all day. Looking for someone that had no reason to be there. She joined in on one of the volleyball games just to burn some of her nerves off. Now, she was so tied up in the Sam drama, she figured how could a little distraction hurt? She laughed once she read the text. Really? Of all the things to worry about, she thinks I don’t have a fork.

  Practice was going to start soon and Sam was still nowhere in sight. She needed to stop worrying about what Mia was doing or how Sam reacted and give her full attention to the team. Where is Sam anyway? Nikki opened the office door so the players could come get the equipment. Maybe she needed a day or two to get over their conversation. Nikki could understand needing space, but shirking your responsibilities. She could resign or tell Nikki she needed time, but to just not show. It wasn’t just Nikki she was letting down, it was the team.

  Sam never showed to practice. Without an assistant, Reed couldn’t follow her plan for the day. Instead of worrying about things she could not change, Nikki decided to keep practice simple. She worked on fielding, keep their skills sharp. With no assistant and a new pitcher, Nikki was sticking to scrimmages for practice. A scrimmage allowed her to watch every play as it was happening and make corrections. Not that it would be hard at this stage in the season to split the girls up. She could quickly explain stations and then walk around. Honestly, this was just easier with her mind wandering. If Sam did not show again, Nikki might have to start thinking of a replacement. It would not be easy to do. Sam knew what Nikki expected and what she needed. Breaking in a new coach would not be an easy task. She wasn’t even sure someone would be interested in an assistant coaching position. One way or another Nikki needed help. Tomorrow she had to talk to Sam privately to see if she was still committed to the team.

  * * *

  She pulled the car to a stop in front of a long driveway leading to a small ranch style red brick house. Mia loved the woods surrounding the house and the large yard located on a quiet block. Mia couldn’t see a vehicle in the drive and assumed Nikki’s truck was in the garage. The front lawn was simply landscaped, three small purple pony plum trees lined up in a row and evergreen shrubs by the house. As she pulled into the drive, Mia didn’t observe anything that reflected Nikki’s personality. Nothing to shed light on the woman she was about to have dinner with. It was nice and all, but did not seem to convey the woman she had come to know. Mia stepped out of her car, listening to the birds chirp as she lifted the pan from the back floorboard. It seemed natural to stand there for just a moment to enjoy the sun shining on her face. The bird’s song in her ears and the light breeze that flowed around her. Mia took a deep breath, hoping she wasn’t making a huge mistake. Excitement had rippled through her the entire day, but now that she was here, standing at the door, Mia was gripped with fear.

  Nikki was home and showered in less than thirty minutes. Since she had extra time, she set a table outside. Enjoying the spring air as she worked. It was a nice day and honestly, unless the weather was bad, Nikki spent all her time outside. She often wondered why she even had a television. As she took her time moving candles around, she heard a car door close. Why was Nikki surprised the doorbell rang fifteen minutes early? She had thought it was just to school, but apparently Mia was early everywhere she went.

  Nikki opened the door and meant to hug Mia, but was halted by the large pan in her arms.

  “Hey, you’re early.”

  “Am I that early? Sorry, I didn’t look at the time. I can come back later.”

  “No, no… come in. Do you need me to carry anything? Is there more in the car?” Nikki looked out the door towards the car.

  “No this is all,” Mia said indicating the pot.

  Mia was holding a roaster with a lid on it. No bags. No ingredients. Nikki didn’t buy anything to cook, she wouldn’t even know what to buy for someone else to do it, but she was sure the food did not just magically appear in the pan. Mia saw Nikki searching for the rest of dinner.

  “Everything is in the pot already. I hope you don’t mind. I thought this would be more manageable and a little less mess in your kitchen.”

  Taking the pan, Nikki stepped back to let Mia through the door. Nikki couldn’t help but gawk as she got her first glimpse of Mia. She took in the black sling-back heels, every inch of the exposed legs and the sleek black dress starting at about
mid-thigh. The dress clung to Mia’s hips and slung low giving a great view of ample bosom. When she turned to walk into the house, Nikki saw that it was also backless, revealing down to the small of Mia’s back. She watched the long curly hair cascaded over olive skin. Nikki gripped the pan tighter, her knuckles turning white. She had too, it nearly fell to the floor like her jaw. If only her hands were still free.

  Nikki looked down at her own relaxed boot cut jeans and simple black polo, then back to Mia.

  “You look breathtaking. I feel under dressed and a little guilty. I’ve been playing softball while you have been getting dinner ready. Is there anything I can do to help?”

  “Yes, you can lead me to the kitchen.”

  Nikki did just as she was told. She bumped the door closed and led the way, taking extra care not to trip over her tongue.

  Mia took her time getting there. She was more interested in her surroundings. The living room was simple. Just a couch, a chair and a television. There was no art on the walls, no plants. Just the one picture of a child with their parents. Mia assumed the child was Nikki. She was wearing a dress and had long hair, but the eyes were unmistakable. The dining room did not have anything in it but a table and chairs. No table cloth or centerpiece. There was nothing that stood out, nothing unique about the house, inside or out.

  “I know it doesn’t look like much, but you should have seen how it looked before.”

  “That bad?” Mia asked skeptically.

  “Yeah, floor to ceiling carpets.”

  “You’re kidding, ceiling?”

  Mia looked at the white ceiling. There was no sign of nails or adhesive, like it had never happened.

  “I know, I thought it odd too. Guess the guy really liked shag carpets. I got a great deal on it and I get an amazing rate of labor, free. Do you want a tour?”

  “Yes. Just let me get this in the oven.”

  Mia set the temperature, leaned back against the small island and willed the oven to warm up quickly.

  Nikki couldn’t wait that long. She stole Mia’s hand, felt the electricity flow from her fingers to her stomach and led Mia away from the kitchen, “It won’t take long. By the time we are done, the oven will be heated.”

  Mia followed Nikki down the tan colored hall, trying to take everything in, but the constant thrum of her heart was making it difficult to concentrate. There were five doors. The first was a small bathroom with wood panel walls. An old stand up shower with a plain off white shower curtain. The oak cabinet with a sink matched the medicine cabinet, even the vanity lights were in a wood frame. The toilet was located on the other side of the door.

  The next room was an office. It only held a standing shelf, probably from Walmart, an ancient green metal filing cabinet and a swivel chair with a metal frame. Mia noted that it was possible Nikki had not even decorated, perhaps all the furniture was from the previous owner. They looked old enough to be. Nikki explained that the third was a pantry and it was exactly as she had said, a shelf in a closet. The fourth, a bedroom that acted as a miniature weight room. At least this room had the wood paneling replaced for drywall. Of course, bedroom or weight room was a little bit of an exaggeration. The room seemed to act as more of a storage room than anything else at the moment. Why is she so excited to give me a tour? This house is old, drab and boring. Mia thought as she looked around. Very unoriginal, so not Nikki at all.

  The final door led to Nikki’s bedroom. Mia waited for Nikki to lead, but she seemed to want to wait in the doorjamb. She finally released Mia’s hand and allowed her to enter. She expected it to be like the rest of the house, but when Mia walked into the room she couldn’t believe her eyes. She was positive she had stepped into a different house. The room wasn’t exactly masculine, more rustic. Like a hunting cabin without the corpses lining the walls. She could smell Nikki’s woodsy cologne more clearly as she stepped inside. There was a fireplace with a handsome wood mantel around the stone which sat directly at the foot of the queen bed. Mia noticed that there wasn’t a lot of color in this room either, but the earthy tones with wood beams on the ceiling really made the room come live. Light infused the room from a candle chandelier. A large window allowed natural light in as well. Mia instantly felt at home. It was like a cozy cottage in the woods. Now this screams Nikki.

  Nikki watched Mia walk by the foot of her bed. Eyes taking in all the hard work Nikki had put into it. The bed had been a lot of work in and of itself. She had constructed the wood frame herself and gotten a few splinters along the way. The matching mantel had not been any easier, leaving nicks, scrapes and splinters from the cement, wood and stone. Labors of love were never easy and would likely leave a few lasting scars. Nikki knew now as she had then, the result was worth it. Mia was the only person to see her hard work come to fruition. Nikki was not looking at the room, only at the woman standing in it. She observed Mia as she took in every facet of the room. Her hand traveled over the comforter.

  Finally she entered and walked up behind Mia as she ran her hands over the Mantel.

  “Is it wood burning?”

  Nikki slipped her arms around Mia’s waist, “Yes. That’s why I wanted this house. Well, one of the reasons.”

  “It suits you.”

  “What does that mean? Suits me?”

  Mia smiled, “It’s charming, homey and rustic. Absolutely gorgeous in every way.”

  The buzzer went off, drawing their eyes towards the door, signaling the oven was ready. Why does something always interrupt?

  “Come on, let’s get that in the oven and I’ll show you what I’m working on.”

  Nikki watched Mia walk down the hall, her hips swaying with every step. Her eyes following every curve as the dress clung to Mia’s body is all the right places. She didn’t know if she could stand another minute without her hands on Mia. Just the intimacy of Mia touching her bed had Nikki’s mind on overdrive. She would only need two seconds to reach Mia and remove any clothing between them. Nikki tore her eyes away and walked in silence, trying to regain control of her libido. When she looked back up she saw Mia bent over putting the pan in the oven, her dress slid impossibly higher. Nikki’s heart skipped a beat and she was sure she had just died. Nikki yelled at herself, No! You will not, cannot, touch her now. She spent all afternoon on this dinner. The least you can do is keep your hands to yourself until it is done. Even if it kills you. She gawked at Mia as she ran one hand through her hair. I think it might kill me.

  Mia turned and could read every thought on Nikki’s mind. Could see the hunger in her eyes. Mia knew Nikki had been staring and that she was trying not to touch her. Mia just didn’t know what she was waiting for. After this afternoon, Mia didn’t think Nikki could wait more than two seconds before bringing her to bed. She fully expected to put the food in the fridge and, maybe, cook it later. Mia carefully picked her outfit down to the last detail. She thought Nikki would have at least kissed her in the bedroom. Instead they had barely touched before the alarm went off. Mia knew when she bent over at the stove it would have nearly shown her thong. Still nothing. What was holding Nikki back? Mia didn’t normal throw herself at someone, but they had been dancing around each other for weeks. Had near misses and intimate stolen moments. Mia was getting tired of the dance. Guess I will just have to be less subtle.

  “Come on. The wine is out back.”

  Mia walked onto the wood deck and saw the small table set for two. The wine was on the table. Nikki poured them each a glass and motioned for Mia to go to the rail. There was a stone path leading to the tree in the far corner of the yard. Undistinguished trees took up the background. The one that stood out was a small American dogwood, its beautiful flowers in bloom. Small lights lined the path. There was a hole in the ground by the deck. Nikki finally joined her and handed Mia a glass. She stood behind Mia and motioned at the hole.

  “That is going to be a small pond. I will probably get gold fish instead of koi. Just as big, but not as expensive to replace. The path is new, we will go back the
re in a couple minutes. I put the deck in last year. Still need a new fence and some bushes.”

  “It’s beautiful. You did all of this? Do you spend a lot of time out here?”

  Nikki put her chin on Mia’s shoulder, needing to be closer. “Most every day. It was very plain, boring when I moved in. But I love to be outside and this is kind of like my oasis. Or it will be, one day.”

  “You seem to have put a lot of work into your bedroom and outside, but not the rest of the house. Why is that?”

  “I haven’t had the house long and it made sense to first renovate where I spend the most time. I will get to the rest eventually.”

  “So how many girls have you wooed with your handsome bedroom and beautiful garden?”

  “Wooed?” Nikki replied with a laugh.

  “Yes. Beauty like this definitely speaks to a woman’s heart. And we both know you could charm the pants off a nun.”

  Nikki didn’t know if she should be offended or laugh. The latter won out.

  “Well I am not actually sure of that. Never tried it. And I have never wooed with my garden.”

  “Is that a metaphor? Because I would love to go in your garden.”

  “No. I mean, I have never brought anyone here. No family, no friends, no dates. Only you. Mia, you are the only woman I have ever wanted to share this with.”

  Mia saw a light in the corner of her eye. When she turned she saw that Nikki had lit candles on the table and along the rail of the deck.

  “Would you like some more wine?”

  “In a minute.”

  Mia didn’t want to move just yet. She realized there was no rush, they had all night to be together and clearly Nikki planned to make the most of every minute. The back of Nikki’s hand caressed Mia’s face. Please kiss me. Mia was a ball of nerves and the longer, slower Nikki took things, the more butterflies she had.