Diary of a True Alpha

by C Y Jones

  I gaze up at Mekka and he nods. Out of the three of us, he’s the one who saw something else in Aspen besides being a mean girl before the rest of us. If he’s fine with her challenging her father, then who am I to stand in the way. “You’re right,” I say softly.

  “I know I am. Now go make your call so you can help your brother get our girl,” she orders and I look at her like she’s crazy. “What? I totally have wifey rights. You three are just borrowing her.” Despite our situation I laugh. Aspen’s little pink haired friend is truly crazy, and I’m glad she has her in her life.

  13

  Aspen

  I am physically and truly in hell. After Axil’s first taste of me, he’s upped his anty in the mean factor. The rest of the week he allowed his betas to run his pack while he trained me in the ways of being a mate to a Bloodmoon wolf. Meaning I’ve spent all my time naked, enduring all the many ways he could come up with to treat me like a second class citizen. That black pillow under his desk and my knees have become very fucking acquainted, but not in the way you’re thinking of. It’s a power play to him to have me kneel before him, completely exposed, and not be able to do shit about it if he decides he wants his cock sucked. There are times when I could practically see it reflecting in his eyes that he wants to shove his dick down my throat, but has shown remarkable restraint. I guess with what he can do, it could be worst. He could be inside me again, like a virus, taking what he wants and leaving me sick and empty.

  Most of the time, I’m forced to endure his company as he places my naked body as he likes around the house like some priceless artifact he craves to look at, but not touch, forcing me to watch and endure him bring more and more human slaves for him to abuse and fuck into oblivion, some who don’t make it out unless it’s to be buried wherever they bury the slaves. When he’s feeling especially mean, he would invite his Betas and their mates to fuck in front of me, forcing me to watch how they pass them around and use their bodies, having no say when it comes to the whims of their mates. That’s usually when I’ve done something to displease him. When he’s in a good mood, he’ll shower me in expensive gifts, thinking he can buy my love.

  Most of the time I’m not even here. I’m like a turtle who has reverted into its shell and has no clue about the dangers going on around it as it stays safe inside. I play my role well. I speak when I’m allowed to, I eat, I perform, but I’m not all there. Because of that, he thinks his training has worked, that he’s broken me. My blank stare and emotionless movements are just tools I use to fool the beast. I’ve learned to play the game, and play it well. I’m just sitting in the dark of my turtle shell biding my time. A wolf laying in wait until she surrounds her prey and attacks. It may seem like no one is home, but that’s just an illusion of my own.

  When he was satisfied with how the first part of his training was going, he decided it was safe to take me out his suite of rooms and join the pack. I was allowed clothes to wear, but mostly skimpy outfits that leave nothing to the imagination. I saw first hand those stocks he threatened me with was not an empty threat. We walked past a pretty brunette who was naked and chained in one with a sign around her neck that said ‘wash my ignorance out my mouth with your cum’ and a long line of wolves waiting to fuck her mouth. I’m completely disgusted with how things are run here, but I keep my mouth shut. I realized it’s not going to get any better for the females unlucky enough to be born or brought to this pack as long as wolves like Axil are in charge. Even if they were to climb up the social ladder, it would still be the same. Both Sophie and Rachel have it as bad as me, maybe worse. As far as I know, Axil doesn’t intend to share me. I’ve seen them passed around to more wolves than I can count. It doesn’t seem to faze Rachel, but you could tell it really bothered Sophie, especially when her mate would fuck Rachel right in front of her. I learned Sophie came from another pack who didn’t treat their females like shit and was foolish enough to fall in love with the wrong wolf, leaving her pack and family behind for this. Rachel was born in this pack and Jax has been in lust with Rachel since she grew boobs. I say lust and not love, because if he really loved his mate he wouldn’t do half the shit he does to her.

  At least that’s what I gathered from the information Axil tells me. Sometimes he’ll lower his guard and pour his heart out, telling me about his pack and his hopes and dreams. He says the way the pack is run is the same way his father ran it, and his father before that. He talks like it’s a complaint, but it’s not like he cares to change anything, but I guess if that’s the way he was raised when he was groomed to take over the pack, he wouldn’t know any better. When he’s sharing and not acting like a total wanker, he was kind of sweet. Too bad he’s a fucking psycho whom I want to kill more than my father. Like now, we're in his favorite room. The porno room whose tan walls used to be covered with framed posters of naked pinup girls are now replaced with photos of me in various stages of undress. The worst is the giant slide show one of the humiliating pictures he took of me on the first day of training.

  I’m in a black pair of silk knee highs and heels, his hands are tightly gripped on my hips as he dry humps me, bouncing me on top of him. Today was one of his bad days at work and he’s telling me about some dispute with a rival pack over land. I’m only half listening. Lost in my shell, lost in the dark. I couldn’t even tell you what his dick feels like brushed up against me.

  “Are you listening to me?” He growls. My eyes flicker to him, and I take in the anger in his irises. No, no I wasn’t listening to him, but I won’t tell him that.

  Putting on a show I say in a husky voice, “no I was too busy enjoying how your cock feels against me.”

  Narrowing his eyes, he gives me an ‘I don’t believe you look’ but he plays along. He really loves his games. “You like this then?” He asks, moving his hips harder. His tip just brushes the edge of my pussy lips, dangerously close to entering me.

  “Yes,” I moan even though I’m shaking in fear. He’s escalated his little game, and I’m starting to fear this will take a turn for the worse, but I perform, acting like I like his touch, crave it. I have become quite the actress.

  “What about this?” He says right before he leans forward and bite my nipple hard. I’m not acting when I cry out, this time in pain.

  Smirking, he moves his cock closer until I can feel him right at my entrance.

  “Whose dick are you riding?’ He whispers low in my ear.

  “Yours,” I cry out. He adds his finger inside me and despite how much I despise him, my body’s biological response is to get wet.

  “What’s my name? I want you to shout my name.”

  With his words, his finger becomes more frantic. I try to go back in my shell, but he won’t let me. Not able to take any more of this, I make myself explode and I cum screaming what he wants to hear, his foul name as I curse him to bloody hell with a flaming dick. As I cream on the outside of said dick, he grunts approvingly. Seconds later, he pushes me off him onto my knees in front of him, and jerks his cum all over my tits.

  “Fuck,” he cries out. Looking down at me with a heated look he says, “after we’re mated you’re getting your tits done and then you’ll be perfect.” The comment should sting, but like I said before, I don’t care what he thinks. I’m perfect for my mates and that’s all that matters. If he wanted a big boobed Barbie, he should have kept Toya around. He moves forward, his thick cock bobbing in my face and I know what’s coming, and dread starts to form a lump deep in my stomach. We’re interrupted when Hulk/Brian, whatever his fucking name is comes in and calls Axil.

  “What?” Axil growls.

  “Her father is here. He wishes to speak with you,” Hulk answers, not fazed by Axil’s anger.

  “What? Tell that asshole to fuckoff,” Axil demands.

  “He says it’s about the girl,” Hulk relays.

  “What the hell? This better be important or he’s a dead wolf,” Axil roars as he pulls his jeans on and stomps away.

  I’m left on my knees
with Axil’s cum cooling on my tits, dripping down my small frame, and Hulk walks over, giving me a devious smile as he occupies Axil’s empty seat.

  “Tell me, little girl. What is so fucking special about you? Why do you have my Alpha tied up in knots? Your cunt can’t be that good.”

  “I don’t know. Why don’t you ask him?” I answer in a hateful voice. No need to tell him that Axil has only fucked me once.

  Moving closer, he’s inches from my face when he says, “you don’t fool me, little girl. You may have him thinking that spark of yours has been snuffed out, but I know better. I can see it in your eyes. I know you’re acting,” he voices sinisterly as he reaches his finger out and twirls it in Axil’s cum around my nipple.

  I don’t react, I don’t move to stop him. I don’t know what game he’s playing at. He brings his face closer, and his rough tongue takes over for his finger. Sitting up, he moans before moving his dark eyes back to my face.

  “When he’s done playing house, I’m going to have so much fun really breaking you,” he comments before rising to his feet and leaves the room.

  I wonder what happened to bring my father here. Maybe he’s wondering how my being gone one day has turned into almost three weeks. Doubtful. That would show he cares, which I already know he doesn’t. If he’s here, it's probably for something for himself. Standing, I go into the bathroom and run the shower. I need to wash both Axil and Hulk off me. I’m about to come out when Axil suddenly enters the shower and throws me against the shower wall until my chest lay flat against the cool title. Coming up behind me, he bites down hard on my earlobe. I scream, my breathing increases as I wonder what the hell is going on.

  “Did you know what your father wanted?” He growls low in my ear.

  “No, how could I?” I whimper, completely confused. I really wanted to fucking know if it’s brought Axil’s wrath upon me.

  “Are you sure?” He questions darkly. His hand comes around my front and he roughly sticks a finger inside me as his other hand pinches my nipple hard.

  “I don’t know,” I cry, and he shoves his whole fist inside me and I scream.

  “I don’t believe you,” is the last thing I hear before he thrusts his fist deeper inside me. With his hand, he fucks me roughly with an uncontrolled anger as if he’s trying to rip me open. His grip on my skin is bruising. The water splattering across my back has now turned hard and feels like sharp needles, and each thrust is deeper as he’s consumed in his hate fuck, until he cums hard, roaring a curse as his seed splashes my ass cheeks. All night he uses his toys to fuck me in the most painful ways possible until I can’t take it anymore and black out.

  When I wake the next morning, I could barely move. My whole body is bruised and itchy from his cum. When my blurry vision clears, he’s sitting on the bed staring down at me with a hateful glare in his cold grey eyes.

  “You need to get dressed. We’ll be leaving here soon,” he says in a gruff voice. “Don’t worry about showering and put those clothes on,” he commands, pointing to the pile on top of the dresser.

  I don’t know what my father said to bring on this hate, but as quickly as I could move my bruised body, I got up and moved toward the dresser. The so called clothes is nothing but high waist leggings, and a tight sheer see through midriff top. I wasn’t allowed a bra or knickers so you could completely see my tits and dark nipples.

  When I’m done dressing, I gather my dirty cum covered hair into a messy bun on top of my head and meet Axil in the kitchen. He’s sitting at the table with all five of his Betas, and after barely glancing at me, he motions for me to kneel on the floor beside him. I do as he asks well aware of his Betas eyes on my body, especially Robert. He’s been eyeing me a lot lately, just waiting for his master to throw him a bone. When the food is served, they all dig in with Axil completely ignoring me. My stomach growls, and he looks down at me with a disgusted look on his face.

  “Are you hungry, pet?” He asks with a sinister look on his face. The same look he’s had since speaking with my father.

  I don’t answer. I’ll just be sealing my doom even quicker. I can practically see the wheels turning in his head. I know he has something planned, and going by the glint in his eyes I’m sure I won't like it. Sitting back in his chair like a king, he folds his hands behind his head.

  “Well go on, eat,” he orders, but he’s not talking about anything on top of the table. He’s looking pointly at his dick which is already hard, tenting his jeans with a smirk on his face. One of his Betas, probably Robert, gives a light chuckle, and I bite back a smart remark. Apparently Axil is short on patience, because he undoes his jeans himself and grabs me by the neck roughly, moving me right in front of him then slams my head on his hard cock. He fucks my mouth like he did last night with his fist and toys, roughly choking me. Taking a move out of Hulks playbook, he cuts off my air, and I almost throw up on him before he lets me breathe. The assault goes on forever before he spilling himself deep down my throat. Then he stomps away, leaving me choking on his seed.

  After that Axil drags me out of the house and tosses me in the Hummer. Burning rubber, he takes off, leaving a trail of dust as we go. This shit is getting ridiculous. What the fuck is going on? Having enough, I think screw the consequences and ask, “what the fuck is your problem?”

  He doesn’t answer, he just continues to keep his head forward, clenching his jaw as he white knuckles the wheel. I give up on expecting an answer and huff as I sit back. We stay quiet the whole drive. An hour in, I see the sign saying ‘leaving Oregon’ and perk up which quickly deflates when I start imagining him killing me and dumping my body. My wolf, who has been strangely quiet lately, is at full alert. She doesn’t trust Axil either. Not only has he taken me against my will, he did the same to her the next day while in wolf form. His big, all black wolf pinning her down as he rutted us into the dirt. Both of us have learned to escape into our precious black void of our mind. Right when I’m about to drift off he suddenly says, “I’m sorry.”

  “Excuse me?” I reply, raising my brow. Is he actually apologizing for the fucked up shit he has done?

  “Your father pissed me off, and I took it out on you. I thought you somehow contacted him and asked him to come get you,” he explains.

  "Is that what he wanted? To come get me,” I ask him shocked. What the hell brought that on? “And you’re listening him and taking me home?” I ask incredulously. Have I enter the Twilight Zone where that wanker of a dad grew some balls?

  “He’s made it so I have no choice,” he spits out, but doesn't elaborate..

  Interesting, I wonder what my father has on him. No really, so I can use it too.

  “Don’t worry your pretty little head, little wolf, you’re still going to be my mate,” he says with a rough voice, “and that very night, I’m going to sink into that tight cunt of yours again and fill you to the brim with my seed, enough that I know you’ll be pregnant with my pups soon enough.”

  What a frightening fucking thought. I got lucky he pulled out the last time. The only pups I’m bringing into the world are with my mates, so he can fuck off.

  He doesn’t say anything to me the whole drive back to Wolfhaven. Too far in his own thoughts of knocking me up with his pups. Unlike last time, if he tries I would probably die that night because I will fight him with everything I got, not like I plan on having the mating ceremony with him anyways. He may think his little mind games worked, but I still have a say on who I choose to tie myself to forever and it’s not him. That honor belongs to the three wolves who really own my heart, body, and soul.

  When we finally pull up to Wolfhaven gates, my body fills with an overcoming sense of relief. I never thought I would be happy to see this place again. It takes walking through Hell to appreciate what you have. Yeah I'd rather be back at Greywolf, but anything is better than Bloodmoon. When we pull up to the mansion, Axil’s firm grip on my arm is the only thing keeping me from jumping ship out the car. I can feel his annoyance, but I couldn’t
find it in me to care. Exiting the car, Axil keeps a firm grip on my arm as we go through the house to my father’s office where he’s sitting behind his desk, barely sparing me a glance, but I don’t really care about him. It’s the two wolves with identical pissed off faces that I only have eyes for. When the fuck did Logan get here? I want to run straight into their arms, but Axil’s firm hold on me prevents me from moving.

  “What are they doing here?” He growls menacingly.

  Looking up, my father finally glances at my bedraggled state as well as Axil’s bruising grip on my arm, but not in a caring manner, more like an observant one.

  “They’re insurance to make sure Aspen does what she’s supposed to do,” he answers nonchalantly. As in he’s using the twins as leverage to get me to mate with the arsehole standing next to me.

  I tune out Axil’s and my father’s conversation and move my eyes back on the twins, watching as their own gazes run over my body from head to toe and cringe at what I know they see. My dirty stringy hair, dried flaky cum on my skin, my see through top showing off my tits, and the countless bruises all over my exposed skin, probably wondering what they’ll find on the places on my body they can’t see like my pussy that’s still healing from Axil’s fist and toys, or my sore candy red ass from his belt. Even with my shifter healing, it’ll still be another day until I’m fully healed. Their anger is so palpable, I can feel it from here, but they’re not angry at me. No, it’s directed towards the wolf beside me.

  “It’s not like she was a virgin when I picked her up,” Axil shouts and his voice drags my eyes off my mates and back to the conversation taking place.