A Kiss For You

by Rachel Van Dyken

  I was about to go find the restrooms and make sure everything was all right when Emery appeared out of the crowd. She looked…shaken. Visibly shaken. As if she had seen a ghost.

  She had her hands clenched in low at her sides, and her eyes were wide, darting here and there and everywhere. Her stride was fierce, like she was anxious to be away. Her shoulders were tight. Something had happened. Something had definitely happened.

  “Hey,” I said, instantly stepping toward her.

  Whatever had hurt her…I would destroy it. This was supposed to be our night.

  “I want to leave,” she said immediately. She wouldn’t even look at me.

  “Emery, what happened?”

  “I said I want to leave,” she said, raising her voice.

  “Okay, okay. I’ll get your coat.”

  I reached for her jacket without a word and ignored the concerned looks on my friends’ and family’s faces. They knew what had been going on with me and Emery. They knew not to interfere.

  I handed her, her coat, and she snatched it out of my hand.

  “Let’s go.”

  “Emery, what happened?” I asked. I followed behind her as she hurried from the room. I reached out and grabbed her elbow to stop her. “Please, talk to me.”

  She jolted away, as if I had burned her. “Why don’t you ask Vanessa?”

  I furrowed my brow in confusion. “Vanessa?”

  “Yes, your ex-wife. She can help you out.”

  My mouth opened and then closed. “She’s here?”

  “What do you think?” she asked before storming back toward the door.

  I followed, but my gaze was wandering around the room as I tried to figure out how my life had crumbled to ashes in a matter of minutes.

  Why is Vanessa here today? What did she hope to accomplish?

  I hadn’t even mentioned Emery the week that I was in New York. She couldn’t know that I had a new girlfriend, because I knew she’d try to wreck our relationship. Whatever her motive, I was not going to let her win.

  We were almost to the door when Vanessa seemed to materialize out of thin air. I could see that she had made an effort. She was here for a reason, and the look on her face said that reason was me.

  Emery noticed her presence, and her hackles rose. “I’m leaving with or without you.”

  “With me,” I said automatically.

  “Fine,” she said, passing into the foyer.

  Vanessa reached me just before I followed Emery. “Hey, where are you going?”

  “What are you doing here?”

  “I came to see you, baby.”

  “Colt was supposed to come tomorrow with the nanny. That is what we agreed on. Not that you would come here and bombard my girlfriend at a party that I never invited you to!”

  “Well, you forgot to mention this fling to me, so I thought I would come spend time with you,” she said, placing her hand on my sleeve.

  “Vanessa, just fucking stop. You know I don’t want to spend time with you, and you’ve clearly offended my girlfriend. I love her, and I choose her. Just her. Only her.” I snatched my arm back, feeling extra disgusted with her at the moment. It wasn’t enough that she had cheated on me with my own friend, but now, she was trying to ruin everything else, and I wouldn’t stand for it. “I think you’re scum on the bottom of my shoe. I wish you would stop trying to ruin my fucking life.”

  “Jensen,” she murmured, her voice dipping an octave.

  “You’re in my life for one reason, Vanessa. One.” I held up my finger. “Colton. That’s it. Otherwise, you can go to hell.”

  I turned on my heel and walked away from her. The last thing I wanted was for Emery to think that I wanted to talk to Vanessa or that I had more interest in what she had to say than Emery hurting. Because that was the furthest thing from the truth. I sprinted out of the building and found Emery hovering by the valet stand.

  She dismissively waved her hand at me. “I already called for a cab.”

  “No. We have the limo.” I gestured to the valet to have the limo come around for us.

  “I can’t—”

  “Emery, please. I don’t know what Vanessa said, but she is just trying to get between us. There is nothing between me and Vanessa. Nothing.”

  “She said you have a son,” she said in a deadly whisper.

  Her eyes were bullets targeted on my face. She was waiting for a reaction. She was waiting for me to deny it. My heart sank. This was not how I’d wanted her to find out. I’d wanted to tell her tomorrow the best way that I knew how. Fuck, Vanessa ruined everything.

  “I do,” I said, dropping my hands. “I do have a son.”

  She shook her head and glanced away from me. “I cannot believe this. You knew that I didn’t know! That I stay out of your family’s drama. I gave you a million opportunities to tell me. This whole second-chance business, and you didn’t think I should know?”

  “It’s not that, Emery. I was going to tell you. I’d been planning to tell you tomorrow.”

  Fuck, this was why I didn’t date in town. I liked to be able to control when I was able to tell someone about my son. Then when I found out she didn’t know, I thought I’d finally have that opportunity to make it right, and Vanessa had fucked it all up.

  “Well, you blew it. Vanessa is here. She’s in Lubbock. She found me and cornered me and tried to make me feel worthless. And you know what? She didn’t succeed. She said some horrible things, but I knew where you and I were, and I was giving us a chance. But then I found out…nope, you weren’t giving us a chance.”

  The limo pulled up in front of the stand at that time. The driver jumped out and opened the door for Emery.

  She shook her head. “You take it.”

  “Please,” I begged. “Please just let me explain. I gave you the opportunity to explain. Give me that same chance. We said we’d try this together. I want to do this together. After we talk, if you think I’ve relinquished our second chance, then I’ll just…drop you off at home. But I won’t let you go. I’ll keep fighting for us because you are the only woman I have ever met who has made me feel like this.”

  She swallowed and looked away from me. Tears glistened in her eyes, but she wouldn’t meet mine. She was torn. I could see it. She was willing to hear me out, but she didn’t think I deserved another chance. I would have to prove her wrong. Because this was all a mistake. A misunderstanding. We could get through this. I would make sure of it.

  Without another word, she sank into the limo. That was her answer. Yes. Yes, she would try.

  I deflated in relief. I knew that this needed to happen. I’d just thought I’d have more time. I also…hadn’t anticipated her being on the defensive when I finally told her.

  It felt like control was slipping out of my fingertips, and I wanted to be able to hold on tight. It just seemed, with Emery, I was never in control. A feeling I was unaccustomed to. But I was beginning to realize, this wasn’t a power struggle; it was just two people in love. And I needed to stop trying to hold on to my past and move forward with my future.

  I took the seat next to her in the limo.

  She scooted over so that she could face me. “Why didn’t you tell me that you had a son?”

  “We’ve only been dating a couple weeks, and I’m a very private person. I wanted to make sure that this was the real deal. I don’t introduce people to my son who are going to leave his life. I don’t think it’s fair to him. Since he lives in New York with Vanessa, that’s where his life is. I fly to New York all the time actually. Nearly every single holiday and at least once a month so I don’t have to uproot his life. I’m fortunate enough to be able to do that.”

  “So…you thought that I would leave your life?” she asked.

  “Honestly, until this week, I didn’t know.” I ran a hand back through my hair and tried to ignore the death glare she was sending me. “But I changed my mind this week and wanted to make it right. Colton was supposed to fly in tomorrow with the nanny so t
hat you could meet him. I had no clue that Vanessa was going to show up unannounced or why she decided to come a day early.”

  “I think she made it perfectly clear to me,” she grumbled.

  “I promise there is nothing going on with me and Vanessa. Our relationship centers entirely around our son.”

  “I just hate that I found out from someone else.”

  “I was planning on telling you tomorrow,” I repeated with a sigh.

  “Too little, too late,” she whispered.

  “Honestly, Emery, I was going to tell you tomorrow. I wanted to get through our date and have an amazing time with you. I even gave you my mother’s necklace.”

  Her hand dashed to the diamond hanging around her throat, and her eyes shot to mine. “You gave me your mother’s necklace?”

  “Yes. Morgan and Sutton have most of her pieces, but she left me a few. She wanted them to go to the woman I loved, and I gave one to you. I’m sure that’s why Vanessa freaked the fuck out. She’s seen it before.”

  Emery retracted her hand from the necklace at the mention of Vanessa. “And you really didn’t know that she would be here?”

  “No. Fuck, no. I don’t want her here. She obviously just wanted to fuck with me.” I cleared my throat. “You told me that you wanted to do these things together. I was going to give you that opportunity.”

  “I think it’s sweet that you wanted me to meet him,” she said softly, “but I don’t know why you wouldn’t tell me before I met him, like…I don’t know…the day you said you saw Vanessa in New York. You were clearly there to see Colton, not her, right?”

  I nodded. “I was.”

  “Yet you didn’t tell me. You told me the whole story about Vanessa cheating on you with Marc, how your ex-wife and Cheaterpants horribly ruined your life, but you left out the part where you had a son in the mix of it all. It’s like I know only half of your story. I got the abridged version of the book. You could have told me at anytime, and you didn’t. Did you think that I wouldn’t be understanding?”

  “No,” I said immediately. “Emery, that’s not it.”

  She wrapped her arms around herself and shook her head. “I think I just need to cope tonight, Jensen. I don’t fault you for having a son. I love Lilyanne, and now, I understand why you’re so good with her. But I just fear that you’ll never really trust me. Maybe you’ll never trust anyone again.”

  Her words lingered between us.

  Half an accusation, half a prayer.

  I didn’t know what to say to that. Had I not trusted her? Had I really been trying to push her away? I’d been planning to tell her, yet that hadn’t been enough. Landon had known that when he had confronted me two weeks ago. Even if I had told her tomorrow, she would have been upset. I could see that now. Falling in love with someone and leaving out the most important thing in your life was showing no trust at all.

  I could see the hurt and despair in her eyes. That I had claimed to love her, yet I had fed her lies about my life.

  She turned her face away from me, and I was struggling to find words when her phone started ringing from the pocket of her coat.

  “Kimber,” she whispered when she checked the screen. Her mouth opened slightly in worry. She picked up the phone right away. “Hey! What’s going on? Is everything okay?” There was silence as I waited for an answer. “Yes. Yes. I’ll be right there. Do you need anything? Okay. Don’t worry about it.”

  She hung up, and I knew what had happened.

  “She’s gone into labor?” I asked.

  “Yes. I need to get home, so I can drive over to the hospital.”

  “What about Lilyanne?”

  “My mom is watching her.”

  “Then, I’ll have the limo drop you off.”

  “No—”

  “We’re going straight there,” I insisted.

  “Okay,” she said.

  She didn’t argue at all, which was a sure sign of how worried and excited she was for Kimber.

  I told the limo driver where to go, and we sped off to the hospital. The rest of the ride was silent. She was brimming with nerves about her sister, and I couldn’t bear to bring up what had happened with us and what we were going to do next.

  The driver stopped in front of the entrance to the hospital wing where the maternity ward was.

  “Thank you for dropping me off,” she whispered.

  “You’re welcome. Tell Kimber good luck.”

  “I will.”

  She reached behind her, unclasped the necklace, and held it out to me. “You should keep this.”

  “It was a gift.”

  “It’s your mother’s. I only want you to give it to me if this works out. And, right now…”

  She dropped the necklace into my palm, and I suddenly felt cold.

  “Right now what?”

  She started to slide away from me, but I reached out and pulled her in close.

  “What does this mean for us?”

  She shook her head. “I don’t know. I can’t think right now. I just need to be with my sister.”

  “I understand. That’s what’s important.” I placed a soft kiss on her forehead. “We’ll figure the rest of this out another time.”

  “Yeah,” she said, sad and distracted. “Another time.”

  With a weight on my chest, I watched her disappear. I’d thought tonight would be the start of everything new. I’d thought, tomorrow, she would meet Colton and see why I loved him so much. And, now, I was left wondering if we were even going to make it to tomorrow.

  Chapter 30

  Emery

  Tears streamed down my face as I stood in front of the elevators. The hospital ward was empty. I was sure the ER was packed with drunken accidents, but here, in this part of the hospital, it was deserted. And I was grateful.

  I couldn’t seem to stop crying. My breaths were coming out in short spurts, and my chest constricted. I felt like I was hyperventilating, unable to get enough air in and hiccuping to try to recover.

  My heart ached. My chest ached. My head ached.

  Everything hurt.

  Walking away from Jensen hurt.

  I hadn’t wanted to do it. But I’d meant every word that I said. He didn’t trust, period. And I couldn’t be with him if he didn’t trust me. That left us at an impasse.

  After the mess back in Austin, I’d thought moving home and trying to figure out what I wanted in my life would be easy. I’d spend time with Kimber and Heidi. I’d find a real job. I’d discover what I wanted.

  Instead, my heart, mind, body, and soul belonged to Jensen Wright.

  I should have stayed sworn off of men.

  I should have stayed far away from the Wrights.

  Then, I wouldn’t be standing here with a heart threatening to shatter.

  “Fuck,” I whispered, jamming the button to go upstairs. I scrubbed at my face.

  No more tears.

  No more.

  Kimber would notice. I was sure of it. But I was here for her now, and that was what was important. Meeting my new niece.

  I took the elevator up to the fourth floor and was directed to my sister’s room.

  “Knock, knock,” I said, entering the room.

  Kimber was lying in the bed with Noah hovering next to her, holding a cup of ice chips.

  “Hey!” she said with a genuine smile. “You made it.”

  “I made it.”

  “Are you okay?”

  “Totally. I’m so excited to finally meet the little one!” I put on a big smile and pushed the last couple of hours out of my mind.

  “Well, it’s still going to be a while,” Noah said. “Water hasn’t even broken, but she’s dilated and having contractions at a regular interval. Same as last time.”

  “I’m here for an all-nighter then.”

  “You look like you came straight from a party. Did you give up your midnight kiss for me?” Kimber asked.

  I glanced up at the clock and realized it was only ten thirty. We’d
totally missed our New Year’s kiss. Not that I was exactly up for a steamy kiss right now.

  “Meh. Don’t worry about it. I know you brought a couple of extra outfits. I’ll just steal your clothes and send Mom back with more when I take over for Lily.”

  “You are going to send Mom here?” Kimber asked hysterically.

  I cackled, finally feeling an ounce of buoyancy. “Now, you admit your true feelings! She’s crazy, right?”

  “I don’t need coaching! I already have two doctors. Sorry, Noah.”

  “No offense taken.”

  “Ohhh!” Kimber yelled. She doubled over as a contraction hit her full force.

  And then I went into full-on sister mode. Kimber gave me something to focus on. I was able to be helpful and be there to make her smile and laugh through the worst of it.

  Right after midnight, my phone started ringing and I saw that it was Heidi. “Is it okay if I take this?”

  “We’re going to be here a while,” Kimber said. “Go ahead.”

  I walked out of the room and found a quiet place to answer. “Hey Heidi.”

  “Em! Where are you?” Heidi asked. “I found the hottest guy for my New Year’s kiss, and I want you to meet him.”

  “I actually left.”

  “Oh, you and Jensen left early for some sex,” Heidi said. I could tell she was drunk.

  “Actually, no. Kimber went into labor, and Jensen and I got into a huge fight.”

  “Kimber went into labor!” Heidi cried, sobering up. “Should I leave? And wait, what fight? What happened?”

  “No, don’t leave. We’re going to be here all night. I can text you when the baby comes.”

  “Okay. But what happened with Jensen?”

  “His ex-wife Vanessa showed up at the party and told me that Jensen had a son.”

  “Well, of course he has a son,” Heidi said. “Duh.”

  I froze in place. “What do you mean of course he has a son, Heidi! You knew? Why wouldn’t you tell me something like that?”

  “Jesus Christ, I didn’t know that you didn’t know, Emery. Everyone knows he has a kid. He’s like this absentee father, who spends all his money on child support and only sees his kid for the holidays. What did you think I meant when I said that he flies to New York every holiday?”